Hysterics Boulevard
by Mint Pizza Queen
Summary: Part II to the Crack Avenue drabble series. Pairings will vary, however, will mostly be RoyEd. Contains 100 more drabbles. [COMPLETED]
1. Love to See You Cry

**A/N:** Guess who's back? Back again? Fear the crack…here it begins. XD

w00t! _(makes peace sign)_ Back already! Took the day off yesterday from updating to take some time to read some fan fiction and to start drabbling! I have the entire list for series two wrote out. n.n

Ed: _(twitching) _Fear the crack…

Roy Uh, Ed? Are you okay?

Ed: _(still twitching)_ Fear the crack…_ (Spazzes while clinging to __Roy_) FEAR IT! _(Does a Foamy the Squirrel laugh)_

Roy o.0

Okay…well…_ (Coughs) _Let's get this drabble started, shall we? Ed/Envy!

Roy _(bug eyes)_

Envy: w00t! I get to play with my _chibi-san_!

Uh…don't even say another word, Envy. _(twitches)_

* * *

**Disclaimer:** You know the drill…insert witty comment here.

* * *

**Love To See You Cry**

_'Crunch.__ Crunch. Crunch.'_

A vein began to pulse in Edward's temple as he looked up from the paperwork he was trying to complete. He gritted his teeth as he glared across the dimly lit bedroom to the culprit of the annoying sound.

_'Crunch.__ Crunch. Crunch.' _

"Stop that."

The figure looked up from the bed and continued to make the noise. He was doing it quite well, especially when all they were doing was grinding leaves with their fingers leaving a mess on the floor for Edward.

"Why?"

_Another twitch of the vein.__ Another glare. Another dagger. Another spot discovered to hide another body._

"Because it's annoying, and I'm trying to finish this before tomorrow."

"Why?"

_'Snap.'_

Ed glared at the broken pencil tip and released a barely audible sigh. "Because tomorrow I go back to Central and I have to turn this in to the Colonel."

"Oh."

_'Crunch. Crunch. Crunch.' _

"I THOUGHT I SAID TO STOP THAT!"

"Oops."

Ed shook his head, pulled another pencil out of the desk drawer, and continued with his work. He was almost done, so why did that certain person have to start acting like a major pain in the ass now? Wait, when _did_ that royal pain in the ass get here? Moreover, _how_ did he get into his room?

"I'm bored."

_'Snap.'_

'Damnit,' Ed grumbled mentally._ Another pencil, another twitch, another soon-to-be victim. _

"Are you almost done?"

Ed spun around in his chair and shot the traditional daggers of doom at the annoyance. Too bad, it didn't actually inflict pain. Boy, it would've been lovely to see him cringing and writhing on the floor in pain…but then again…

"I would be done if you would stop annoying me for five goddamn minutes," the alchemist began, "but everytime I get closer to finishing, you make another crunch, another comment, and it's bugging the hell out of me. So can you just stop making any noise whatsoever for five minutes? That's all I need."

The figure shrugged and laid back on the pillow. "Sure, I guess."

Edward turned in his chair once more and grabbed another writing utensil from the drawer. It wasn't a pencil, but the tip wouldn't break as easily. Thank the lord for pens.

He was down to the last word when he heard a loud crack. Then a bang. He turned his head and gaped at the newly formed hole beside his bed.

_'Snap.'_

The pen in the alchemist's hands snapped in half, gushing ink all over his face. Although it was blue, it didn't really clash with his uniform. But blue was definitely not his color.

Envy grinned as he waved back. "Heehee…sorry about the wall…"

"Envy, why do like to bug me when I am at my busiest of moments?" Ed slammed his face down onto the desk, careful to try to avoid getting a nice blue face print on the files.

Envy strolled over and patted him on the back. "Because I love to see you cry. See you next time,my chibi-san."With that, he leaped out the window before Ed could pummel him.

* * *

**A/N: **Poor Edo-kun. XP 

Ed: …I hate you.

Envy: I love you too. n.n

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	2. Breakfast

**A/N:** This drabble has no pairing in it. Unless you want to make it a **_REALLY _**random pairing and say Edward/Food. O.o Not even going to ask if you do…

Ah, the magic of fan fiction. In this one, Al is restored! n.n

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Every time I go to the doctors, I get a jacket, a straight one. It makes me feel special because I get to hug myself.

* * *

**Breakfast**

Sunlight beamed through the window and landed teasingly on Ed's face. He covered his head with the blanket only to get stuff and uncover again. With that said and done, the light his him on the face some more increasing agitation.

Ed rolled so he was facing the other way, but became alert when he sniffed the air. It wasn't a bad smell…but it was something that made his senses kick in. _Something was going on in the kitchen, but what?_

He staggered out of bed and dragged himself out of the bedroom down the stairs. The smell became stronger, and his mouth began to water. He could almost see the source now…

He opened the kitchen door and stepped in to find Al, Winry and Pinako all seated at the kitchen table with their plates of food.

Winry looked up and smiled. "Oh, hey, Ed. Breakfast is ready."

Whatever the girl has said after breakfast was instantly drowned out by the sounds of Edward gobbling down his breakfast.

_Food first. Talk later._

* * *

**A/N:** Nothing to say. n.n Except I know someone's gonna say something about the 'something was going on in the kitchen' line. I just know it. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	3. Paper Cut

**A/N:** This drabble I get a major kick out of. Inspired by a comic I read. n.n They may seem a bit OOC…but for a very amusing reason.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Bad day at work is an understatement.

* * *

**Paper Cut**

It was the first time Roy was working on filling out paperwork without his traditional gloves on. Truth be told, he had left them in his jacket pocket, which was across the room, and he didn't feel like getting up. Besides, Riza had threatened to fill his ass with lead if he attempted to get up from his chair. Moreover, she had Fullmetal babysitting him while she was out chasing Hughes away from Roy.

He sifted through the work until one of the sheets slipped through his fingers at an awkward angle and he felt a sting. He gritted his teeth, dropped his papers and glared at his finger. A trickle of blood ran down his finger.

Edward saw this, instantly was up, and had given the Taisa a tissue until he came back with a couple bandages.

Edward, seeing Roy irritated by the new pain that wasn't going to be going away for a few hours, decided that this would be a perfect time to start nagging.

"So, Roy, now that you've cut yourself, are you going to be fired? Are you going to get an infection? Are you going to sue? Are you going to quit?"

Roy stared blankly at the boy. He then glared at the boy while holding his bandaged finger. "Oh come on! People are cut, scratched and burned all the time! This is just a minor injury that's not a big deal! Honestly, could anyone be MORE sadistic?"

Edward held a hand up. "Hold that thought." He ran out of the room, and a few seconds later, returned with Riza who had a smirk on her face.

"I heard someone got hurt! Were there parts flying, gallons of blood rushing and people screaming?"

Ed looked up to Riza and grinned. "Riza! You missed it! Roy cut himself and was bleeding! It was cool!"

"Neat! This is such a wonderful development!"

Roy made an expression of pure disgust as the two traded comments. "This is ridiculous! You people are nothing but blood thirsty, violent sadists that are causing the world's fall!"

Riza frowned at Roy for a moment. "Oh, I'm not happy about the actual injury..."

Roy blinked with confusion. "You're not?"

Riza's smirk returned to her face as she took out a huge stack of papers out of nowhere. "Nope! I'm excited that now I get to torture you by making you fill out the accident forms!"

* * *

**A/N:**_ (snickers)_ Poor Roy…gets a simple paper cut and he gets buried…thanks to Ed. XD 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	4. Lunch

**A/N:** I think it's time to put a coupling in_…(__draws a random coupling out of hat)…_Edo and Fuery? 0.o Dunno how that got in there…_(quietly places it back into hat)_

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I'm not antisocial...I just hate people.

* * *

**Lunch**

"Kain? Are you feeling all right? You're very red in the face."

Kain Fuery sat across from Edward holding the glass of water in his shaky hands attempting to hide any nervousness or embarrassment. Too bad that Edward was actually watching the water pretty much spill all over the table in a way that even got Fuery's sleeves wet.

"Fuery? Do you need to go to the restroom or something? Or do you need to go to the infirmary?"

Fuery shook his head as he regained some of his composure. "N-no, sir, I'm fine."

"Please don't call me sir."

"Sorry sir."

Edward groaned. Kain took note of this and quickly apologized again.

"I'm sorry, sir—er—Ed, it's just I'm not used to calling someone of higher rank something other than sir…"

"Kain, we're not at the office, we're at lunch. I'm treating you to lunch. Relax."

Edward rose from his seat and stepped around so he was directly behind Fuery. Fuery tensed as he felt Edward's hands on his shoulders and began to relax. Ed's fingers moving on his tense muscles were working like magic. Seconds later, Kain found Edward back in his seat. Kain let out a soft, yet annoyed, groan of protest.

Edward snorted and leaned forward resting his chin on the palms of his hands. "Let's just have lunch, Fuery, and then we'll see about what we can do later at my place."

Fuery couldn't help but grin.

* * *

**A/N:** n.n' Eh…nothing to say. 

Roy Bad, Ed, bad! (_smacks__ Edward)_ You're supposed to be mine!

Ed: (_dazed and confused)_

Roy_ (drags Ed away from MPQ and Fuery)_ You fool, what am I going to do with you? _(pauses)_ Lock you in the closet! With me! Muwahaha!

Ed: o.O

…okay then…

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	5. Slippers

**A/N:** I believe this is my first drabble with Black Hayate…it's adorable though! n.n

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Cute plus evil equals run like hell.

* * *

**Slippers  
**Black Hayate walked through the new domain and sniffed around quizzically. It was a new environment, strange smells and new places to explore. 

He had been taken in by that psycho woman who had shot at him several times telling him that he has a 'strict new mommy now'. _Strict mommy?__ Geesh, hope there wasn't a daddy._

The puppy sniffed the air again and caught whiff of something that instantly perked his senses. His master was currently asleep, so she wouldn't be in the way…

He ran up the stairs to the master's bedroom and looked around trying to find the source of the interesting smell. His eyes caught shape of something on the floor next to the bed.

_'Could it be?'_

* * *

"Black Hayate! Where did you bury my slippers?" 

Gun shots roared through the house as a mad woman dashed after her dog, who had seemingly taken her prized slippers and buried them somewhere in the backyard…

* * *

**A/N:** Bad Black Hayate! _(shrugs)_ All well. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	6. Pamper

**A/N:** RoyEd. n.n _(drools)_

Envy: _(glares)_  
  
Me: _(shifty eyes) _Uh…later, Envy. Just a little bit later. You can be back with your _chibi-san._

Envy: WHEN?

Me: Uh…wait and see.

Envy: Hmph.

**Crazykitsune17:** Sure, you can use that Ed x Food thing! Or Gluttony x Food thing. o.O Don't have to ask! XD Let me know when you write it up! I really want to read it. n.n

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Insert witty comment that is sure to piss off Edward.

* * *

**Pamper**

Edward was enjoying this. No, enjoy wasn't the word for it.

He was _savoring_ the moment, he was _relishing _it, and he was mentally _rejoicing_ the feel of the _Taisa's_ hands on his achy back teasing out the tense muscles after several weeks away on a mission.

Roy had seen the poor boy walk in with his report about ready to keel over in pain when a Charlie Horse sprang up his flesh leg and had somehow managed to travel up through his back muscles. Whether it was a trick or not, Roy wouldn't let his secret lover leave…

_…without having his hands all over him, of course…_

Edward let out a soft moan of delight as Roy's massaging fingers worked up the boy's back so he was just below his shoulders and neck. He shifted his head and heard himself let out a soft noise. Roy heard the noise and raised an eyebrow of interest.

Purring?

_Ooh, purring._

Roy lifted his hands away from Ed's back just to see the reaction. Ed turned his head and shot a glare at the older man.

"Hey, who said you could stop? I'm tired; I'm achy. **PAMPER ME**."

Roy rolled his eyes and began to massage the boy's shoulders. The blonde instantly went back into dream mode.

"You know, Edward, for one having lower ranks that I do, you're superior in every way imaginable…except height…"

Either Ed had fallen asleep, was too busy enjoying this, or was plotting the best way to kill the man. Roy had personally hoped that it was the first two…

* * *

**A/N:** I love that line. "You're superior in every way imaginable…except height…" XD That was my NS for messenger for a while. n.n I had changed it though… 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	7. Dinner

**A/N:** Another RoyEd. _(dodges Envy's fists of fury) _It's implied this time! O.o

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Some bonds don't break.

* * *

**Dinner  
**"Are you sure you want to do this, Taisa?" Edward felt himself being pushed through the front door to the fancy restaurant. "After all, I should be getting back to Al, I left him all alone back at the hotel with Winry, and she's just as dangerous as Riza with those damn guns of hers." 

"I want to treat you, Fullmetal. You've been working hard." Roy opened the doors and pushed the boy inside, who was still resistant to going in.

"Okay, that's just scary."

Roy stood waiting for the waiter to come and raised and eyebrow. "What is?"

Edward looked up and replied heatedly, "Well, for one thing, you haven't picked on me about my height today; you snapped at someone who did make a crack about me, and then you're taking me out to dinner? Are you feeling sick or something?"

A waiter approached and led the two to a booth in the far back. Roy sat down across from Edward who hesitantly took the menu from the waiter. The man took their orders for drinks, and went off to fetch them.

"I'm feeling perfectly fine, _Edward,"_ Edward dropped the menu onto the table with an expression that clearly read _'What the fuck? He just said my name.'._

"Don't just stare at me, pick something out to eat."

Ed shook his head. "Come on, Mustang, you're not fooling anyone. What do you want?"

Roy let out a small smirk as the waiter walked over with their drinks. The flame alchemist gave his order, and picked out something for Edward who was still resisting the fact that Roy was taking him out to dinner.

As the waiter left, Edward glared. "Why?"

Roy took a sip of water. "Why what?"

"Why are you taking me out?"

Roy would've let his traditional snaky smirk rear its head, but instead, he just closed his eyes. "What's wrong, Edward? Don't like getting treats? I just heard from a friend that you hadn't had a decent meal for a while, and wanted to make sure you did get something good into your stomach."

"Why," Edward began again, "would you take me to the most expensive restaurant in Central though?"

When Roy didn't answer, Ed raised an eyebrow. "Are you trying to imply something that you may think I may spas out on?"

"Implying, yes. You having a spasm on it, most likely."

"Okay." Ed looked around for a moment before looking back at Roy. "So, will you be free tomorrow morning?"

"Yeah, why?"

"I want to take you out to breakfast."

* * *

**A/N:** _Edo-kun_ got the hint! n.n 

Envy: NO! _(Sobs) Chibi-san_…he's…he's…leaving me! _(Weeps)_

Me: _(pats Envy on back)_ There, there, it's okay…in a few drabbles he'll be with you again…

Envy: Really?

Me: No.

Envy: _(bitch slaps)_  
  
Me: O.o

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	8. Sick

**A/N:** There should be a law against making a character so damn cute_…(__glares at Ed)_

Ed: What did I do now? O.o

Me: You're too cute for your own good!

Ed: Is that bad?

Roy Unless you want to be stuck with me. n.n

Ed: I—uh_—(coughs)—_I'll be leaving…with Roy now_…(__nudges Roy and they both leave)  
_  
Envy:_ (arrives a little too late_) No! I missed chibi-san! _(scowls)_

Me: No you didn't! You're with Edward in this drabble!

Envy: REALLY? YAY! _(runs around room happily)_

Okay, obviously EnvyEd.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I'm like a bomb that's ticking…I got voices in my head.

* * *

**Sick**

Well la-de-da, the almighty Fullmetal Alchemist Edward Elric, champion of the people, was sick in bed. _With the stinking common cold._

Edward pulled the quilt over his head and let out a groan as he let out a couple coughs. Being sick _sucked_. Even worse, he was at the apartment alone. Alphonse was back in Rizembol aiding Winry with some new automail repairs with a much aggressive customer.

And they said that **_HE_** was cranky in the morning…

He coughed again and finally threw the blankets off him. He threw his legs over the mattress and stumbled to gain balance.

"Either I get too hot, or get too cold, or I can't freaking breath, or I'm too achy to sleep…damnit!" He sneezed.

Making his way into the kitchen, he grabbed the teapot and filled it with water. He threw it onto the stove and waited impatiently for it to heat up. '_Tea will help. Tea always helps. Tea is good. So is chicken soup. But I am NOT going out at the moment…I feel like poo.'_

Edward chuckled at his own mental rambling. _Okay, now the fever was roasting his brains. _

He heard a knock on the window and looked up slightly startled. He dragged himself across the room and threw open the shades to reveal no one there.

_Did a bird fly into the window but manage to take off before he got there?  
_  
He sighed and was about to go back to the kitchen when he heard a knock again. Turning his head, he nearly wet himself when he was staring face-to-face with Envy, who was grinning like a mad-man.

"Oi! Open the window, _chibi-san_! I got some good news!"

_News?__ Chibi-san? Open window? _

**_Brain malfunction._**

Ed opened up the window anyway and the homunculus leaped in carrying a brown bag. He marched into the blonde's kitchen, who wasn't giving much protest. He just wanted his tea, damnit, and to go back to bed!

"I brought you some stuff, _chibi-san._ I got some soup, some cough syrup, cough drops, and uh—Envy pulled out several magazines and newspapers and tossed them onto the table. "—and some entertainment."

Ed tried to absorb what was going on, but his over fried brain didn't comprehend what was going on.

Envy noticed Ed staring blankly at him and grinned. "Why don't you go back to bed, _chibi-san_, I'll fix you some of that stuff called tea and some soup if you want."

Ed nodded dumbly before turning and dragged himself into his bedroom. Envy turned and grinned. "Ah, thank goodness he's here alone. I can have some quality time with my poor, defenseless, _chibi-san_."

_'Of course, eventually I'll have to kill the boy. Not now though.'_

* * *

**A/N:** _(whistles nervously on the last line, then runs out of the room like mad)_

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	9. Habits

**A/N:** RoyEd. n.n

Envy: _(glares)_

Me Okay, stop that! You get your drabbles, let them two have theirs!

Envy: _(stomps off) _They always have theirs…-.-

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Oh, the games we play…

* * *

**Habits  
**Some habits die hard. Some habits are ones worth keeping. Some habits are reminders of the good old days.  
_  
And some habits are just plain annoying. _

Ed grumbled to himself as he recited that line in his head repeatedly for the thousandth time that morning. _He would resist the annoyances…he can, and he will. _

See, the problem wasn't Edward. It was Roy. Edward had finally broken Roy of his dirty habit of skirt chasing (Edward gave Roy the choice of either skirt chasing or no snuggling in bed. Obviously, Roy made the right decision cause he's still alive, eh?), and now Roy was bored beyond sanity. So, he found himself entertainment.  
_  
_Holding the medium tip pen in his hand, he tapped it off the desk, switching beats occasionally.

Of course, it wasn't just the desk he played the pen off; he also tapped the pen on the lamp, the coffee cup, the stacks of paperwork, and even then, the window.

Ed would roll his eyes every once in a while as the taisa amused himself, but it has officially been a good forty-five minutes and this had to stop.

_'Tap-tap-tappity-tap-tap-clang…'_

"Roy, you should be working."

_'Clang-clang-ping…'_

"Roy?"

When Roy didn't respond again, Edward decided it was time to take action. He rose from his seat on the couch and marched over to the man who was still too focused on attempting to recreate _'Wipe Out'_ on his lamp.

Edward gently pulled the chair that Roy was sitting on out a few inches away from the desk. He then turned and plopped onto the man's lap and grabbed the pen and chucked it across the room into a flowerpot.

"What did you do that for?"

Edward pulled the man's collar and scowled. "You have some annoying habits, taisa, which could really get you acquainted with Hawkeye's guns."

"Oh, really?" Roy pulled him closer. "Well, you have some bad habits of your own."

"Really?"

Roy nodded slightly as Ed began to nuzzle his neck. "And you're doing one right now."

"I am?"

"Yes."

"What am I doing that's bad?"

"You're interrupting me while I'm in the middle of entertaining myself with music."

_'Smack.'_

Well, Roy certainly learned a new musical note.

* * *

**A/N:** Tisk tisk, Roy, should know better than to piss off Ed-kun. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	10. Apologies

**A/N:** Most likely going to be bopped for saying this, but, it's RoyEd again.

Envy: _(bops MPQ with a jumbo mallet)_

Ed: Well, she got bopped…

Envy: _(gives Ed a devious look)_

Ed: 0.o'

Envy: _(kidnaps Edward)_

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Don't tell me to go to Hell when you don't know what Heaven is.

* * *

**Apologies  
**He hadn't meant to say those words to him, honestly, he didn't. He was just too angry to think before they slipped out like acid onto open wounds. 

He knew that what he said hurt his lover, but did he say anything to comfort him?

_Of course not. _

He just stood for a moment watching as the words of poison seeped into his soul and tainted him. He waited, and then left without another word.

Even the First Lieutenant was stunned by the angry words. She avoided him since that day, which was ultimately exactly one week ago from today. Why she would ever want to partake in the battle the two men took part in was beyond him.

He sighed and watched as the air fogged around his warm breath. It was chilly that morning.

_Of course, all miserable mornings are chilly. They aren't when you have that special someone standing beside you to keep you warm, but why would he be here with a bastard like you?_

That's it; he couldn't take it anymore. He took that little nagging voice and shoved it into the pit of his mind along with his pride. He wasn't going to go around with more guilt than necessary, and besides…

_He hated getting the cold shoulder from everyone at the office. _

He went to a flower stand, grabbed a bouquet of assorted flowers and bought them. He rushed back to the office, hopefully, not missing his chance…

Of course, when he got there, everyone had been chatting away happily till he walked in. Riza first took notice and look slightly taken back to see the flowers he had in hand. The rest of the officers shushed and watched as he walked into the office and closed the door behind him. They all instantly crowded around to listen inside…

"Fullmetal, what are you doing here? I didn't send anyone out to fetch you."

"Roy, I have something to say."

"I don't want to listen to you. You said some things I wished you hadn't said."

"Will you at least look then?"

There was a long pause and the tension could be felt outside the office. Everyone bit their lip as they heard the sound of chair legs grinding on the office floor. They then heard the crinkle of the paper wrapped around the flowers and a sigh.

"I'm sorry, Roy."

* * *

**A/N:** Aw, so sad. Then happy. Don't ask what Ed did. He just said some stuff that upset Roy and Roy didn't want to hear him (ever have one of those moments with someone? Yeah…). Well, Ed finally threw his pride out, went and apologized with flowers. 

This idea had come to mind when I was listening to "Broken" by Seether featuring Amy Lee.

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	11. Sundays

**A/N:** I am sorry for not updating with a few drabbles. n.n _(sweat drops) _I was writing a one-shot that began nagging me to no end, and I just had to write it. You understand, right? _(gets pummeled to the ground) _Okay, I guess not. x.x _HavocFuery._

My little theme for the next several drabbles are the days of the week. :3 Enjoy!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Let us pretend I'm normal.

* * *

****

Sundays

Ah, Sundays. Day of resting and restoration so one could work their bums off for the rest of the week. The day in which last minute chores were completed hastily _(and sloppily) _only to end up being redone the following weekend.

Havoc stared at his messy apartment and glared at it furiously. Oh how he wished that he wasn't a slob. Oh how he wished that he didn't have to clean every weekend. But, alas, Sundays were a mandatory cleaning day for Havoc, because every Sunday night a certain person came over.

Havoc gritted his teeth as he ran around hastily cleaning the windows and washing laundry and dishes, folding the sheets and tucking them away neatly. He ran around cleaning the kitchen, making it as clean as possible. He even went around with the vacuum several times making sure he cleaned the floor good enough.

He straightened up the cushions of the couch and cleared off the magazines that littered the coffee table. He then finally went into his bedroom and straightened up the bed and reorganized the clothes in his closet and dresser.

There was a knock at the door and his frowned turned upside down. He strutted to the door and opened it to find the familiar face once more standing outside eagerly.

"Hey, Fuery. Come on in."

_Showtime._

_

* * *

_

**A/N:** Organized!Havoc is cool. When he actually IS organized…

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	12. Mondays

**A/N:** Oh, great X'hal, Mondays. x.x Second part to the week series. _RoyRiza implied._

_

* * *

_

**Disclaimer: **To quote the great Garfield-sama, "_I hate Mondays_".

* * *

****

Mondays

Roy hated Mondays. There was no arguing there.

The moment he opened his office door, a great tidal wave of reports and forms spilled over him and drowned him in a sea of nonsense and irrelevant exclamations.

Once he had managed to trudge his way through the swarm, he seated himself at his desk and got to work scribbling his name on the dotted line, not really reading or caring what the papers had to say. As long as they got out of his face, he was happy with it.

Riza, on the other hand, loved Mondays. It was the day in which she got to see Roy's surprised face when he was knocked to the ground by a giant wall of papers and folders (and maybe some staples and paper clips…). It wasn't every day you got a real treat like that.

A scream came from the office in which the beloved taisa was in and Riza smiled.

'I guess he finally read one of the papers he signed…'

As a joke, Riza had stuck some wedding forms in there with his and her names on it. She had signed it, and by sticking it in there, she hoped that he would sign it, then notice her name, and freak out.

"RIZA? WHAT IS THIS?"

_Plan executed perfectly._

Riza loved Mondays.

* * *

**A/N:** Ever wonder if Roy would spas after reading a report AFTER signing it? XD I did…I'd love it if that actually happened… 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	13. Tuesdays

**A/N:** The third installment of the week series. n.n

* * *

**Disclaimer: **This just isn't my day.

* * *

****

Tuesdays

Edward walked down the long stretch of hallway, begging for it to keep on stretching like this forever. Alas, all good things come to an end. He reached the end of the line and had a hand rested on the doorknob.

It was Tuesday, time to turn in that mission report.

Why must he turn it in in person? Why couldn't he mail it? Or give it to Hawkeye so she could give it to that damned _taisa_?

Why did he have to go into that dreadful office and put up with insult after insult for a solid three hours? Why did he have to face that damned smirk _(that he greatly wanted to slap off…with his automail FIST of course…)?_

He let out a sigh as he regained some of his composure. _Might as well get the verbal abuse over with since it was that time of week…_

He twisted the doorknob and pushed open the door. He walked inside and slammed the door behind him. Seconds later, a clap could be heard and the sound of girlish screaming came from the office.

Edward opened the door with a triumphant grin on his face and a new folder at hand. Okay, so Tuesdays weren't all that bad…

At least he was only in there for less than three minutes instead of the usual three hours, with a new mission at that.

* * *

**A/N:** What did Edward do to Roy? The world may never know_…(winks)_

I just might give the answer in one of my otherdrabbles…after all, there is stilllots more to go. n.n

-Mint Pizza Queen


	14. Wednesdays

**A/N:** Fourth installment of the week series! HavocFuery and _Edo-kun _saving the day! Sort of…

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Some days I just feel like hell. Don't you?

* * *

****

Wednesdays

Wednesday was Fuery's favorite day of the week. Not because it was the halfway point of the work week, but because Havoc worked in the same room as him.

Ah, Havoc.

Havoc had Fuery on his lap and was currently in the state of _'snuggle and nuzzle' _mode, and hadn't even noticed Edward walking into the office. The blonde alchemist raised an eyebrow and looked back out of the office and saw Riza approaching.

He closed the door and made a grunting noise in his throat. Fuery noticed and looked up, waking Havoc out of his state of snuggle-ness.

"I suggest if you two want to keep snuggle-time each Wednesday that you go back to your desks before Riza walks in…" Edward pointed to the door hastily.

Havoc and Fuery split back to their own desks just as Riza walked in. She had no clue what the two had been doing.

Edward waved a folder at Riza who nodded and led him to Roy's office. He turned while Riza's back was to them and gave a grin and a thumbs up.

Cuddling Wednesday has been saved, thanks to The Fullmetal Alchemist!

* * *

**A/N:** See? Edward can keep a secret…and be a good guy! n.n

Ed: I…I helped them? O.o

Yup!_ (happy grin) _

Ed: o.o'

-Mint Pizza Queen


	15. Thursdays

**A/N:** Fifth installment in the week series!_ (Ponders for a moment…) _Hmm…don't mind me, new idea just popped in mind. Anyways, gotta remember Psiren and the investigator! n.n I think that dude is hilarious…he totally pissed off Ed…XD

* * *

**Disclaimer:** The mask makes me feel...cool.

* * *

****

Thursdays

Psiren stood boldly from her perch and a smirk traveled to her lips as she watched the investigator run through the maze of city streets trying to find her. She shrugged off her mask and shook her hair loose, letting out a sigh of boredom.

It was Thursday night, and as usual she had gave the newspapers the location on where she would strike next. And of course, as usual, the investigator with the slightly over-sized ego that matched his determination failed to catch her and was now chasing her.

She sat down on the roof and pulled a little knapsack and opened it to reveal a full picnic. She grabbed the sandwich and began eating.

Thursdays weren't as exciting when that little _chibi-san _wasn't around…

Speaking of _chibi, _what was Edward doing right now on this Thursday night?

"HEY! FREEZE!" Psiren looked up and groaned. So much for a picnic.

* * *

**A/N:** First time writing one with Psiren and the investigator. I wonder…how does the investigator and Psiren react when they find out that Ed is missing in the very end of the series? O.o' 

Sorry, I'm probably gonna get all emotional now_. (sniffs) _Poor _Ed-kun_…

-Mint Pizza Queen


	16. Fridays

**A/N:** Sixth installment in the week series. _TGIF_.

Ed: Eh?

Thank God it's Friday. Hey, ironically it is Friday! Cool.

Ed: …

…never mind.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** …can't work...tacos... _(-Aqualad from "Titans East Part I", Teen Titans)_ _

* * *

_****

Fridays

Roy tapped his pen impatiently on his desktop. His eyes were fixated on the clock watching impatiently as the second hand ticked around the face of the clock ever so slowly.

It was Friday…Friday evening to be exact…and in five minutes he would be leaving for his wonderful home with wonderful plans for the wonderful weekend on his mind._'Tick. Tick. Tick.'_

_'Four minutes more,'_ Roy thought to himself. He fidgeted in the chair watching as the second hand continued its never ending journey around the clock.

His eyes left the clock for a moment as he gathered up his stuff and began to shove pens and staplers and other office supplies into the desk drawers. He peered up at the clock.

_'Three minutes more,'_ he thought to himself again.

He got up from his chair with several stacks of papers and placed them on the filing cabinet for Riza. He went to his bookshelf and straightened some books for no particular reason except to pass time…

He looked at the clock again. _'Two minutes more…'_

He grabbed his jacket and threw it on and stood right by the door with his hand on the handle. His eyes staring impatiently at the clock.

'One minute more…'

He began to hop back and forth from one foot to the next. Finally, the clock struck the hour and the bell chimed.

A grin spread across his face as he threw open the door and ran down the hallway.

"I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Edward, who had been chatting with Riza, stared wide eyed as the Colonel ran down the hallway flailing his arms in the air. Who knew that the Colonel would get so enthralled over the last day of work?

Oh yeah…no paperwork to do and no psychotic Riza breathing down his back with a couple pistols at hand…

* * *

**A/N:** I love that. I'm FREEEEEEEEE! n.n'

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	17. Saturdays

**A/N:** The final installment in the week series. I love this day the best. _RoyEd_. n.n As if you didn't see that coming…

* * *

**Disclaimer:** You ate the last Twinkie! I kill you!

* * *

****

Saturdays

Ah, the weekend has finally arrived. It was bright for it being only six in the morning, but hey, earlier the wake the more stuff gets done, right? Right?

Roy extended his arms in a stretch and let out a yawn as he sat up in his spot on the bed. He heard a slight groan beside him and lifted the blankets to see Edward's feet instead of the golden hair and eyes as expected.

Roy peered under the blankets curiously, and finally climbed out of the bed. He walked to the foot of the bed and threw the blankets up to see a half-asleep Edward who grinned groggily at him.

"Morning, Roy, what time is it?"

Roy smirked. "Six in the morning."

There was a loud groan as Edward threw the blankets back over his head. "Too early. Need sleep."

"Come on, Ed, Saturday's only come once a week. There's so much to be done--"

"--and so much sleep to catch up on." A muffled voice called out.

Roy scowled and put his hands on his hips. Well, since today was Saturday…

…he might as well start some of his chores now. And it just so happen that the bed was to be stripped and the sheets were to be washed along with the mattress being flipped over…

Edward was _not_ going to be happy.

* * *

**A/N:** I couldn't resist having Edward in that position on the bed. It gives even more childish characteristics in a way…n.n 

Ed: _(scowls)_

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	18. Gross Out

**A/N:** I couldn't really keep you guys waiting to see what Ed had done to Roy in drabble 13 ("Tuesdays") now could I? Here's what Ed did and what Roy's saying about it. n.n

Roy: _(glares)_

Ed: _(gloats)_

Me: _(runs like hell)_

_

* * *

_

**Disclaimer:** It's a gooey kind of love.

* * *

****

Gross Out

Roy was standing amidst the disaster zone with a look of utter disgust and horror on his face. _'How--what--where--why--'_

Now, there were several reasons as to why Roy's brain was currently malfunctioning. The first was the fact that Edward had gotten out of three hours worth of insults and ranting.

The next was the smell…oh the smell! The horrible odor!

Roy flung his pants and jacket off, ran out of his office, and slammed the door behind him gasping for air.

There were several snickers and the _'click'_ of a camera going off. Roy looked up scowling to see Hughes grinning and waving a hand timidly.

"Hey, Roy. What did you do to Fullmetal that resulted you uniform-less?"

Roy gestured towards the door. "Why don't _YOU_ go look for yourself, Maes."

Hughes walked over to the door, opened the door slightly only to slam it shut and had a grim expression on his face. "…"

"…well?"

"I feel so sorry for you, Roy. But there's a good thing out of this…"

Roy placed his hands on his boxers and glared. "What's that?"

"You have plenty of manure to start a decent sized garden."

Hughes fled down the hallway narrowly avoiding the scorching flames.

* * *

**A/N:** Yes, Fullmetal changed Roy's desk into a pile of manure which had ultimately fell onto Roy's lap in the process. n.n 

Ed: Yay! It's a stinky type of revenge! _(content smirk)_

Roy: _(glares and rubs fingers together)_

Ed: _(nervous grin) _Heeeeey, Roooooooy, buddy, old pal…

Roy: _(continues to glare) _

Ed: …………lover?

Roy: Okay, fine_. (stomps off)_

-Mint Pizza Queen


	19. To The Rescue

**A/N:** I was actually reading some fan fiction when this idea popped into mind. O.o Interesting…

* * *

**Disclaimer:** It's things like this that contributed to my fear of Hughes with megaphones…

* * *

****

To The Rescue

Alphonse stared up from the base of the tree and groaned. "_Nii-san, _please come down!"

_"Never!"  
_  
"Why?"

"I don't want to!"

Alphonse groaned again. Ed had been up in the tree for the past…three hours was it? Longer perhaps? He had attempted to climb up the tree to fetch his brother, but ended up with his brother kicking his metal head off and Al ended up falling to the ground in search of his head for a good thirty minutes.

"Need some help, Alphonse?"

Al turned to find a grinning Maes Hughes, who looked like he was carrying a…megaphone?

"Anything, sir. My brother is up this tree and won't climb down. I've tried to climb up after him, but he kicked off my head!" Alphonse pointed to a slight dent to the helmet.

"…one moment."

Hughes paced along the ground for a moment. He looked up the tree, and to the office building where he saw Roy's office window opened. A smirk crept onto his lips as he pulled the megaphone to his mouth and held back a snicker of evilness.

"Edward, get down from that tree!" He yelled through the megaphone, slight crackling and piercing coming from the opening.

"No! Go away!"

Hughes grinned even more. "Okay, I understand. You want me to get your lover Roy to save you like a kitten from a tree, right? You want me to go fetch your knight in not-so-shining armor so he can sweep you away from this horrible place and take you to his kingdom?"

_'Thud'._

Edward Elric lay sprawled on the ground with a much angry expression on his face. An even angrier voice came from the office window.

"HUUUUUUUUUUUGHES! YOU PROMISED YOU WOULDN'T SAY ANYTHING!"

_Bingo._

_

* * *

_

**A/N:** No comment. n.n

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	20. More Than Just Dinner

**A/N:** Should I be worried that there are already over 50 reviews for this series and I have yet to reach twenty drabbles? Oh wait…here's the twentieth now. x.x

This drabble is by request…all requested drabbles shall be written and posted…I like to get things done. Drawings will be posted and linked in my user info…I just haven't had a chance to draw yet, been busy cause my sister's birthday is coming up on Wednesday. I am so tempted to run into her room at midnight, throw confetti in the air, and shout 'happy birthday' and…end up getting my ass kicked. o.O It would be so worth it though. Anyway, EdoHavoc for Sika Kuriyama!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Thiiiiiis is the niiiiiight, the most beeeeeaaaautiful of niiiiiiiights..._(gets hit by a flying shoe)._

* * *

**More Than Just Dinner**

_'Sluuuurp.'_

Havoc watched in utter amusement and wonder upon how the boy was engulfing the spaghetti…_one noodle at a time_. What even amazed Havoc even more was the boy was on his second plate and had eaten his first dish exactly the same way.

He watched as the boy picked up one noodle at the end of his fork and stuck it into his mouth and slurped it up only to have the strand of spaghetti leave a messy trail of sauce on his chin and nose.

This was just too much to pass up. He knew that the boy wasn't paying much attention to what he was doing, and pretty much wasn't looking at Havoc…so…

Havoc carefully slipped part of a strand of spaghetti from Edward's plate into his own mouth and watched as Edward unconsciously slipped the other end of that same noodle into his mouth and began to slurp, eyes adrift in another direction.

Edward slurped and Havoc leaned forward as the distance between the two began to dissipate. Havoc's grin widened as their lips touched.

Edward's eyes drifted downwards at his own lips and saw that Havoc's were on his. He looked up without moving his mouth and without smacking the man. Instead, he smiled against the other man's lips.

What happened next caused Havoc to have his eyes bug out for a good thirty seconds before he realized what was happening. Of course, he hadn't expected Edward to start smother him with kisses over a trick he had seen on a Disney movie…

* * *

**A/N:** Remember "Lady and the Tramp" spaghetti scene? That's what I referring to with "Disney Movie". n.n 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	21. Boy or Girl?

**A/N:** I'm back again! Heehee…my sister had a good birthday. n.n We're celebrating it with everyone on Saturday (had a mini-one yesterday). I didn't get a chance to update last night because we went to see "The Dukes Of Hazzard" _(huzzah!) _I love the series, and the movie was just as hilarious. Enos is the hotness. Like Ed. Bo is cute too. Me no like Luke. X.x

Anyways…**Katie**, why don't you email me sometime and I'll tell you exactly what I'll be doing in the future, kaykay? And um…marry you, **Sika**? I dunno…this is so sudden. XD **Fireness**, I asked my sister which one should be the lady and which is the tramp, and lo-and-behold, she said that Ed was the lady and Havoc was the tramp. XD Spaghetti is like the food of FMA fan fiction…lol. I just noticed that too, **crazykitsune17**. XD **K. A. Maples**, new reviewer here to my drabbles, eh? I suppose I could stick a few Ed x Riza in there. Oh, hell, expect quite a few throughout this series. I like Riza x Ed as much as Roy x Ed. **Tinystarkitten**, you gave me an idea with that Evil!Elicia. _(evil grin) _Muwahaha…also, **Kari Williams**, you gave me an idea too. Beware! MPQ is thinking! O.o

Okay, enough chitchat and stuff…time for drabbles. I thank my sister for this topic! n.n

* * *

**Disclaimer:** That girl can rock…wait, that's a guy? Oops.

* * *

**Boy or Girl?**

"Yo, Jean," one of the other officers that was good friends with Havoc ran over to him with a cheesy grin. "I gots a question for yah, pal."

"Okay, sure. Hit me."

"Who's that person over there?"

Havoc looked to where his friend was pointing and couldn't pinpoint whoever it was he was talking about. "Who?"

"The blonde, who is that?"

"Which blonde?"

"Uh…" The guy faltered. "Well, that one…is it a guy or a girl?"

Havoc realized which person he was talking about and a grin came to his face. "I don't know, why don't you ask yourself? It looks like it's a girl, hair is down after all, and who else in the military had long, blonde hair?"

Jean knew this guy didn't know Fullmetal. Oooh, this was just too much to pass up.

"You think I should?" The guy sucked in air to make his chest appear larger and more muscular. "Wish me luck."

Jean snickered as the guy trotted over to the blonde. "Good luck." He turned and muttered. "You'll need it."

* * *

Edward was sitting at the table having a conversation with Roy when he felt a tapping on his shoulder he looked up with a raised eyebrow to see an officer, one he had never seen before, grinning at him. 

"Hey, missy, would you like to go out with me sometime?"

Roy turned his head with a snicker as he mentally counted down.

_'Three…'_

_'Two…'_

_'One…'_

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING A LADY?"

_'Thwack.'_

* * *

Havoc was leaning against the wall of the cafeteria when his friend came over with a now bruised head and a black eye, who also appeared to be limping. "Well, did you get a date?" 

"It wasn't a girl."

Havoc raised an eyebrow pretending to be surprised. "Oh?"

The guy scooted away with a grimace as Ed turned and glared in his direction. "I'll never forget that face for as long as I live…"

Havoc grinned. "Sure hope you don't, that there is the Fullmetal Alchemist. And he's already got a boyfriend."

"…not even going to ask. Wait, you knew?"

_'Shit.'_

* * *

**A/N:** Big mouth Havoc strikes again! XP 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	22. Babysitting

**A/N:** This is dedicated to **tinystarkitten** who gave me the idea for this drabble. _Evil!Elysia_ heading your way!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** No one can resist the face.

* * *

**Babysitting**

"Okay, this shouldn't be too difficult," Roy clapped his hands together and grinned happily, "We're just watching Elysia till Maes and Gracia come back from that there meeting…which will be over in…two hours?"

"If it's not too difficult, then why did you drag me along?" Edward scowled at the man as he picked up crayons from the floor.

"Because, I like to torment you."

"So I noticed…" Edward stood up, "And another thing I noticed is you aren't watching the kid."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yup." Edward placed his hands on his hips and smirked. "Tell me, where is she?"

Roy grinned. "Right over the—" he looked to the couch where she was sitting, but currently there was no little girl to be seen.

"Well?"

"Find her, Edward."

Edward faltered. "Me? Why can't you?" Roy glared. "Okay, fine." Edward dashed up the stairs to look in the bedrooms as Roy looked around downstairs.

Roy checked the downstairs bathroom, the laundry room, the dining room, obviously the living room, and was about to run upstairs to join Ed in his search when he noticed another door.

He turned the handle and threw it open. It was a closet. "Elysia?" He stepped inside to find a light. "Elysia, you in here?"

"Nope!" The door swung close and there was a clicking noise of that of a door's locked being, well, locked.

Roy tried to open the door but it wouldn't budge. "Okay, Elysia, you had your laugh."

"No I didn't!" The girl whined slightly, "I want to torture big-brother Edward now, Uncle Roy!"

"Maybe I can help you if you let me out…"

He could hear giggling. "Nope! I am gonna do it myself!" He heard her patter away up the stairs.

He slid down so he was sitting towards the back of the closet. There was one option that came to mind instantly: torch the door and find the brat. But then, on closer examination, he could smell the chemicals from cleaning supplies which just so happen to be strategically located on shelves above his head. "Greeeaat."

Meanwhile, Edo-kun wasn't having any luck trying to find the girl. "Elysia?" He peeked under her bed to find thousands of stuffed animals barricaded under it. "Sheesh, how many toys does this girl need?" He began to dig through them calling her name till he heard giggling from the door. He looked up to see Elysia.

"Hey! Me 'n Roy have been looking for you! Where were you?"

Elysia smiled innocently. "I was outside getting one of my toys. And I think Uncle Roy's in trouble," She put on a distressed expression.

"What do you mean, trouble?"

"I think he locked himself in the closet downstairs."

Ed dashed out of the room growling. "Figures, that idiot would do something like that—" He reached the stairs and began to descend it rapidly and didn't notice the skateboard that the girl had oh-so carefully planted on the third step from the top. His foot went on it and down he went…

…and smacked right into the closet door.

Roy heard a _'thump'_ and instantly shot up. "Edward? Is that you?"

"Mppph."

Stars and spots filled his vision and soon the world faded into darkness.

* * *

"Elysia, honey, we're home! Um…where's Roy and who is that on the couch?" 

Elysia looked up from her coloring book and grinned innocently. "It's Edward! He's pretending to be a mummy! And Roy locked himself in the closet."

Maes unlocked the closet door to see that Roy was scowling a very dangerous scowl. "Hey, I see you three had lots of fun!"

"Yeah, loads of it." Roy muttered.

"_My mim mom!"_ Came the muffled cries from Edward, who was currently wrapped head to toe in medical tape. Only his eyes and nose were uncovered.

"Since you three had so much fun, Roy and Ed can come over and baby sit again tomorrow!"

Horrified looks went onto the alchemists faces. A gleeful and devious one on Elysia's…

* * *

**A/N:** DUN DUN DUN. TBC? My mim mom means "I did not." 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	23. A Tip From the Master

**A/N:** Yay! I feel so accomplished! I aided in the task of inspiring! Damnit, I am never EVER role playing as Starfire again. X.x' I'm glad you guys (and girls) liked the previous two updates. I've never seen so many…er…emotional, energetic, ecstatic reviews? The three 'e's? Hey, that looks like an alien or something. **'e's**. The e could be the body and the '' could be the antennae and the s could be the tail. Heh, small things amuse the easily amused. Anyway, this next drabble my sister gave me the idea for while we were at a restaurant earlier waiting for our meal. It's a continuation (sort of) off of the drabble _"Misunderstanding"_ from the _Crack Avenue_ series of mine. n.n' RoyEd.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** It's not that I'm evil or anything, it's just…you people force me to be this way…really…

* * *

**A Tip From the Master  
**Roy snickered uncontrollably as he tried to hide his face behind the menu. Edward was glaring at the man with a flushed face and appeared as if he were going to sock the man any minute now… 

"Shut it, Mustang."

"Sorry, but you have to admit, that was pretty damn funny—"

"I said SHUT IT."

Roy looked over the menu amused. "Okay, fine. Just pick something out." Edward growled slightly and told Roy what he was going to eat.

A woman approached and eyed Roy. Edward watched as her eyes danced across Roy's figure and she seemed to lick her lips. "Can I take your order,_ honey_?" She said with a hint of heat in her voice.

Roy nodded not taking any heed. "Yes ma'am. I'll have the Philly Steak 'n' Cheese please and—" Roy paused a moment before a smirk crept onto his face," –and he would like to have the turkey club with a side order of chips."

The woman eyed Edward but settled for a glare at him. "And for drinks?"

"A coffee please and a glass of water."

She nodded and turned to leave, that was before she observed Roy for a moment. Ed could see the woman lick her lips again before dashing away.

"That woman was checking you out."

"Jealous?"

Edward leaned back in his chair which almost fell backwards. "Nope. I'll keep her away from yah."

* * *

The meal went fairly well, if you were to ignore the fact the same waitress came out every two minutes to practically worship Mustang, whereas she didn't even pay a heed of attention to Edward, who kept flashing glares at her. 

Finally came the time to pay. Roy looked at the bill and took out his wallet.

"Hey Ed, how much should I give the lady for a tip?" Roy pulled out several bills and filed through them.

Edward tapped a finger on his chin. "Nothing."

Roy faltered. "But—why?

The woman approached. "Did you enjoy your meal?" She asked fluttering her eyelashes at Roy and passed a glare at Ed, whom already was loosing his cool with the woman.

Roy passed a curious look to Edward who continued to glare at the lady. "Sure did, here's the money for the bill, and here's for your tip." He was about to hand her a nice sized tip when Edward grabbed Roy's hand.

Edward smirked at the lady. "She don't need a tip. I think she got plenty just by checking you out."

She raised an eyebrow. "I deserve a tip, I waited on you!"

Edward stood up and had a firm grip on Roy's arm. "Okay, then. Well, here's a tip. QUIT CHECKING OUT MY BOYFRIEND IF YOU WANT TO LIVE. Thank you." With that, he marched out the door dragging a highly annoyed Mustang.

The woman blinked. "His—boyfriend?" She shuddered.

* * *

**A/N:** I have no words. X.x 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	24. Priceless

**A/N:** Sorry for the lack of updates. _(sweat-drops)_ Here's a few to fill those cravings! This one is sort of implied RizaEd. Huzzah!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Happiness is a state of mind.

* * *

**Priceless**  
There was a lot a person could buy around Central. However, some things couldn't be bought, no matter how much it was needed or how much it was wanted. 

Havoc kept a mental list of all the prices of various things. Why, he didn't know, but it did come in handy at times.

Some of these items were odd things, things you wouldn't even bother trying to remember the price because they were just normal everyday things that seemed…well…something you'd get in habit. Other things you'd never expect to get again.

Here's a start of a mental list that Havoc kept in mind.

The car that he drove, fifteen thousand _(15,000)_ cenz.

The uniform that he wore, one hundred twenty five _(125)_ cenz.

The desk that he worked at, one hundred thirty nine _(139)_ cenz.

The pens he used on his paperwork, two _(2) _cenz a pack.

The pack of cigarettes he carried in his pocket, five _(5)_ cenz.

The look on Roy Mustang's face after Riza Hawkeye bent over and kissed Edward Elric fully on the lips in the taisa's office, _priceless_.

Havoc smiled. Yup, the best things money couldn't buy. Fortunate for him, Maes Hughes was selling snapshots of that moment for one cenz a pack, with an added bonus of five wallet-sized snapshots.

* * *

**A/N:** I was thinking about that commercial, and tried to use it for something dealing with FMA. I didn't want something that seemed trite or anything like that. Here's what I came up with! 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	25. Little Black Book

**A/N:** Another update. RoyEd. _(ducks and skitters away) _

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Does it look like I have a snappy comment for the moment? Well, what do you know, I found one.

* * *

**Little Black Book  
**"Roy," a firm yet somewhat quiet voice came from the doorway, "what is this?" 

Roy looked up from his paperwork to see Edward holding up a black object in his hand. "A black book."

Edward continued to glare at him.

Realization hit Roy in the face like a cast iron frying pan. "No way, Edward! You can't be serious!"

"I'm dead serious."

"But—I—it's all I have left of my youth!" Roy jumped up exasperated. He approached the blonde with a pleading look.

"You promised you'd get rid of it."

"I promised not to use it, I never said I was going to throw it away!"

Edward sighed. He held out a hand to the black haired colonel. "Give me a pair of scissors."

"WHAT? No!"

"Fine then, give me one of your gloves."

Roy eeped and bit his lip. "But—"

"A pair of scissors or a glove. Give me one or the other. Either way, it's going." Edward shook his hand impatiently and expectantly.

Roy groaned inwardly. He should've hid that book in a better spot instead of in his underwear drawer. Wait, what was Edward doing in his underwear drawer anyway?

Well, both choices left him in a pit. With the scissors, he had the chance of putting the book together himself with a lot of tape, but with both choices he could have Alphonse help him put the pieces back together with his alchemy…but that raised a higher risk of Edward finding out…

"Now." Edward requested firmly.

Finally, Roy handed Edward a pair of scissors. Ed grabbed them and turned to leave. "This little black book, Roy, will be the confetti at the Military Dance tonight."

_'Oh shit.'_

Solution: Grab a really big broom and don't let ANYONE leave until he has checked to make sure he has every little piece of paper.

Oh, and a plastic bag would be useful too.

* * *

**A/N:** Oh god, poor Roy. X.x 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	26. Glomp

**A/N:** Another update tonight? I will post more tomorrow! Wait, it is tomorrow. X.x It is exactly midnight now…okay, well…yippee! Update! RossEd implied! Maria Ross that is. X.x'

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I may look innocent, but I am actually a psychotic child with a plot of world domination. Muwahaha…

* * *

**Glomp  
**"Have you ever been glomped?" 

Maria Ross blinked at the young blonde. "E-excuse me?"

Edward grinned. "Have you ever been glomped?"

Maria raised an eyebrow quizzically. "No, I can't say that I have, why?"

A smirk replaced the grin. "No reason." He paused. "Do you even know what a glomp is?"

"Do I want to know?"

A chuckle left the boy's throat. "It's nothing sick, I promise. Want me to demonstrate it?"

Maria shrugged. Edward took that as a yes and stood up from the chair he was sitting in and stood in front of the door. "Okay then, stand up and stand in front of your desk. Right there, okay."

Maria complied. She noticed that there was a clear path from her to Edward. '_What the hell is he up to?'_

"Okay, promise not to scream?"

Her eye's widened. "I thought you said it wasn't anything bad!"

"I didn't say bad, but anyway, it's not! Just stand right there. Don't move." Edward stretched his legs for a moment and looked up again. "Ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be."

With that, Edward dashed across the room. Maria's eyes bugged out as he tackled her and wrapped his arms around her waist in a tight hug to prevent her from falling.

"Glomp!" He grinned happily. "That is a glomp!"

"A tackle-hug?"

He nodded. "Yup!"

A knock came from the door and the two parted. "Edward? Armstrong is here to take you to the library."

Edward waltzed to the door and wiggled his eyebrows with a cocky smirk. "See you around, Maria." With that, he left.

Denny Broche entered after watching the boy leave. He found a smiling Maria.

"Denny?"

"Yes?"

"Have you ever been glomped?"

* * *

**A/N:** Need I say more as to where this is going? XD Let me just say that I have to blame my friend nathalsa for introducing me to the wonderful technique of 'glomping'. It's her fault! _(points to nathalsa)_

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	27. Golf

**A/N:** Only a couple updates tonight. Didn't get much of a chance to write more drabbles cause I was busy making a list for…Aaaaaah…shutting up now.

**Warning:** Evil!Edward with NotGoingToBeHappyBecauseHe'sInPain!Roy. n.n

* * *

**Question:** Would it be better for you guys (and girls) if I created a public journal on GJ or LJ or something so you can keep up to date with my updates or future plans and stuff for fan fiction? See what I have planned in the future, when my next updates will be, etc? Lemme know!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** It's not that I'm obsessed with your feet or anything, Edward. It's just…I uh…I have a foot fetish! Yeah, that's right…Oh, and golf is evil. Golfing is boring. Me no like golf.

* * *

**Golf**

"Golf is a sport of patience, Edward. Now, relax and free the mind, body and spirit. Focus on your goal: focus on the ball."

Edward stared in annoyance and in slight terror at the man. "_Riiiight_, whatever." He adjusted his grip on the golf club and concentrated on his swing.

"Be one with the ball…" Roy whispered to the boy, "Be one with the ball…_be_ the ball…"

"Roy, shut up or you're going to **_be_** the ball in about two seconds."

"Focus on hitting the ball, Edward."

Edward grunted with a warning. "I have my sights on a couple of _other_ balls that are worth hitting with this here club instead of that damn golf ball…"

Roy took the hint and in a dignified manner, crossed his arms in front of him and looked onward. "Just hit the ball."

Edward took in a deep breath and swung. Instead of hitting the golf ball, his club flew out of his grasp and clanged off of Al's armor.

"Nii-san! Watch it!"

"Sorry Al," Edward replied with a glare in Roy's direction. Roy smirked as he handed another club to Edward, who got back into his position and practiced his swing for a couple of seconds.

"Try again, and don't let go of the club this time."

Edward gripped the club and tested his stroke one last time. Finally, he did a little step and took his club back in a full swing.

Instead of hitting just air, he felt the club connect with something behind him. He heard a loud grunt and the thud of someone dropping to the ground. He turned his head to see Roy on the ground in fetal position with a pained look on his face.

"Well, since they usually say 'four' when striking a golf ball…would I say 'eight' since I hit two?"

* * *

**A/N:** I am so evil. Sorry Roy! n.n 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	28. Heartbeat

**A/N:** Here I go again! This is sort of implied RoyEd…not entirely…hell, I was gonna make this into a full-fledged story. It's been on my computer for…several months? _(ducks flying shoes)_ Sorry! 0.0

* * *

**Disclaimer:** The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, "I'm from the government and I'm here to help."

* * *

**Heartbeat**

Edward hovered beside the hospital bed and stared mournfully at the sleeping person in it. He hated seeing the Colonel like this, wrapped up in bandages and paler than the hospital sheets. However, he would never admit it to the higher in stature and rank Mustang.

A sigh escaped his lips as he bent over and fixed the blankets, which were entangled with one of Roy's arms. He folded it slightly to make it appear neater in a way.

Roy shifted his head slightly, but remained asleep.

Ed's mouth curved into a forced smirk and he chuckled quietly. "I guess you finally got the boot, Colonel. Kept being a pain in the ass until you literally got what you kept giving. Too bad you're not awake so I can gloat with glory."

The only response was the soft breathing from Roy. Edward's face fell and he stared at the sheets that were on top of Roy's chest. _Rising, falling, rising, and falling_. They moved with each breath that the man took.

As much as he hated to admit it, Ed wished that the black haired man would wake up and start insulting him. Call him short, a pipsqueak, anything. Just to hear him say something so the Fullmetal would know he was still alive and still Roy.

He held his breath for a moment; he laid his head down on the sleeping man's chest and listened to the rhythm of the beating heart. The beat was strong. Edward released his breath and listened to each powerful 'thump' in the man's chest. Breathing was just as strong, but not as deafening.

"Can I help you, Fullmetal?"

Edward would've gasped at the voice of Roy, but instead, he closed his eyes and took in the sound of his ever still beating heart. "Nope."

"What are you doing?"

Edward pulled his flesh hand up from his side and placed it on the man's chest where his heart was and held it there for a moment. "Listening to your heart beating."

* * *

**A/N:** "No comment" is a splendid expression. I am using it again and again. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	29. Liar

**A/N: **Wow…lots of reviews. Lol. Thankies! Also, a reply to my newest fan!

**CheeseFairyXXL**: I've never had mint pizza, but I plan to eventually! n.n Taisa is 'Colonel' in Japanese, I would never punish you, also thankies for the ideas! I shall use them:D Thanks for all the reviews! Also, you don't have to review every single one of them if you don't want to, yes that disclaimer was a quote from Teen Titans, and I hope I didn't write many stories that you had in mind. O.o

Oh, and **Sika**…what day shall we marry? _(winks) _I'm all set and ready to go! Lol.

Be sure to check out my homepage for news on updates and plans for the future! This one is RoyEd.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **You know you're bored when flicking a lint ball becomes all-consuming.

* * *

**Liar**

"Ed! You have to believe me! I didn't tell anyone at the office about us being together!"

_Crash._

Another plate had fallen victim to Edward's flailing hands.

"Do you honestly think that I can believe that?"

"I promised you the moment we got together that I wouldn't tell anyone! Maybe they figured it out on their own?"

_Twang._

A knife embedded itself into the wall beside Roy's head.

"They aren't that smart."

"You'd be surprised. But honestly, Ed, I didn't tell them!"

_Smash._

"Liar."

Meanwhile, outside, Maes Hughes was seated comfortably in his hiding spot with a pair of binoculars and was giving a full detailed account of Roy and Ed's bickering to the others at the office over the two way radio…

* * *

**A/N: **Evil Hughes! It was all Hughes' fault! It's always his fault. ØØ 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	30. Pandora's Box

**A/N: **Just to let you know folks, this drabble I wrote at 3:15 in the morning. I couldn't sleep cause I had the horrible urges to write (when I should've been sleeping) and so, I got up and started writing. n.n I am so weak against my urges. This is implied exRoyEd. Yes, ex. It's over. _(gasps)_

* * *

**Disclaimer: **My kingdom for a new punch line!

* * *

**Pandora's Box**

Edward couldn't understand it. That or he just plain refused to understand it. Either way, the message was clear and there was no beating around the bush.

_It's over._

His love left him, his one true love, Roy Mustang. He finally told the boy that the us that there was now no longer existed. It was just a you and me, no we.

Then it dawned on Ed; there never was a we. Roy had been playing him like everyone else who had crawled into bed with him in the past. It was a game, and Ed had lost. Ed was a toy, just like everyone else.

_And Roy had grown tired of playing with that toy._

* * *

**A/N: **I can't believe I broke them up. I do crazy things at early hours! O.O Forgive me! 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	31. Ninja

**A/N: **I just realized I haven't written any with Envy for a while…

Envy: And why is that? _(puts hands on hips and glares)_

Me: _(sheepish grin) _Cause…I've…been writing…RoyEd?

Envy: Okay, that does it. _(tears off suit to reveal a ninja outfit as seen in cheesy ninja movies) _You are going to pay! SHACKLAHA! _(goes kung-fu style on me) _

Me: AAAAAH!

* * *

**Disclaimer: **The earlier you set your alarm, the longer you can oversleep.

* * *

**Ninja  
**_I am the shadow of the night. I am as cunning as a fox, and as stealthy as a panther. I blend in with my surroundings and attack my prey without them even knowing who was the one who sealed their fates…_

_I am the mystery of the Mysterious Forest, I am the mystery from the deep blue sea, I am--_

"Envy, what are you doing?"

Envy looked down from his perch on top of the ceiling fan and glared at the blonde. "How did you find me? I am the shadow of the night, as cunning as a--"

"It's kinda hard to miss the black ninja outfit on a white-washed room."

Envy looked from his outfit and thenat the room and grunted. "Well, it would've worked if it were dark in here."

* * *

**A/N: **Just something random. 

Envy: At least I got me chibi-san. _(huggles Ed)_

Ed: …

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	32. Boys

**A/N: **Okay, there are two parts to this drabble. Part one is "Boy", and part two is "Girl", compris? Okay, now that THAT is settled, the pairing is EdWinry! n.n _(dodges rotten tomatoes) _

* * *

**Disclaimer: **You wouldn't believe how hard it was to keep myself from saying something. n.n'''

* * *

**Boys**

Boys were the tough part of the human race. They showed no tears, put up lots of fights, and had an ego to match. Boys were known for picking on the weak and were also known for being the trouble-maker part of society as well.

But there was one boy who was a bit different than the everyday boys. He did cry, even when he didn't want to. He put up a lot of fights, but almost one hundred percent of the time it was to protect, not to boast.

Although you could say he was egotistical in a way, he only did it to make everyone believe he was normal, when in fact he was not. He was far from normal. Because this boy, he didn't pick on the weak, he protected them. He pretended to be a trouble maker, when in fact, he couldn't even steal a piece of candy from a baby.

What made this boy even more special was the fact that he admitted that he cared for her. He told her as plain as day that he loved her and would do anything to protect her.

That's what made this boy so special. And she loved that boy because he cared.

* * *

**A/N: **…nothing to say. _(crawls away)_

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	33. Girls

**A/N: **Part two!

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Do you know what if feels like for a girl in this world? (-Madonna)

* * *

**Girls  
**He never knew what made girls be the way they are. The high pitched squeal when they spotted a giant gem stone in the jewelry shop's window, or the instant tackling which they called 'hugging' that pretty much knocked the wind out of the victim. 

He could never understand their little obsessions with hair, make-up, 'girl-talk', boys, and all that stuff. He just couldn't understand it.

He also couldn't understand why some girls were like other girls for that matter. Such girl was his best friend.

She wasn't the jewelry type of girl. She didn't care for make-up or hair for that matter. She was more into mechanics. She loved to get dirty when working, she didn't give a damn if she broke a nail, and the only time she ever squealed was when there was a new tool or a new style of automail.

There was one thing that this girl did that was similar to the other girls, however.

She loved him.

Not just for his good looks, either. She loved him because she knew who he was. She loved him for who he was and that's what he adored about this girl.

He loved girls like that.

* * *

**A/N: **Eh. O.o' 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	34. Birthday

**A/N: **It's very hard to write something amusing/romantic after watching a very angst-like movie. x.x Anyway, no pairings in this one. _(OMGZZZ!) _Sad ending! For Edward-kun anyway…**NO CONTINUATIONS OF THIS ONE! **I think...(_sweardrops) _Knowing me, I'll probably end up continuing it.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Dieting is easy when you set your mind to it. I know longer crave food...IT'S THE CALORIES I CRAVE!

* * *

**Birthday  
**Edward should've expected this from the moment he rose out of bed that morning. He looked at the calendar and saw the date that was unmarked. It was Elycia's birthday, but it was also his birthday. 

He walked into the building that morning to see everyone swarmed around Hughes giving him the gifts for his beloved daughter who was currently out of the vicinity. He walked by them silently without making a noise and went to the cafeteria.

No one spoke to him that day, with the exceptions of Roy picking on his height when he had Fullmetal go into his office to refill his coffee cup. Riza had said '_good afternoon'_, but other than that, nothing.

He grabbed the gift for the birthday girl and sighed. He had a simple plan in mind. Get present to birthday girl, avoid causing a scene, make it home in time to crash and burn in the bathroom and attempt to drown self while showering.

He knocked on the door and was greeted by a grinning Maes.

"Hello, Edward! Come in, come in!" He ushered the boy inside who looked around at the party favors and decorations. Several of the military personnel were there giving Elycia their full attention.

"Listen, I can't stay long, I have to go--"

Roy looked over. "Well, Fullmetal, I'm surprised to see you here. I didn't think you could make it after all, you're so short you could fall into a crack in the road."

Edward completely ignored him. "As I was saying, I can't stay long. Give Elysia my birthday wishes and my gift please." He turned and instantly marched out the door without another word.

Gracia walked into the living room. "Did I just hear Edward?"

Havoc looked up from his cup of juice. "Yup, but he left."

Gracia frowned. "He left already? I didn't get to wish him a happy birthday."

Riza blinked. "Happy…birthday?" She nearly slapped her forehead. "I forgot! Today was also Edward's birthday!"

Roy frowned. "No wonder he didn't even put up a fight about my comment."

-----

Edward laid in the bathtub and felt the warm water envelop his aching limbs. He stared at the wall in front of him. Not a single '_happy birthday'_, not a single card, not a single gift. He sunk lower into the water so his nose was just barely above the water. Just another year that has gone by, nothing more.

* * *

**A/N: **I feel so guilty for doing this to Edward. But this movie I saw was about a little girl locked up in her parents basement for 14 years and wasn't allowed ANYTHING. Didn't have any parties or anything…and…yeah…I feel the guilt. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	35. Confrontation

**A/N: **As hard as it was to write EdWinry because I was so used to RoyEd…I was able to do it! n.n **crazykitsune17**, I don't know why I entitled the other drabble "Pandora's Box". It popped up out of nowhere and it seemingly fit the moment. And you can never read too deep into a story. XD But your idea seemed to fit also. xD **CheeseFairyXXL**, I shall write that story! n.n Sure, you're also invited to the wedding. Lol. I'll write more EdWinry for yah. And of course Ed is awesome! **Machuta Ariole, **I'll write more EdEnvy. I'd write some with you in it, but I don't know you very well. Lol. **Fireness**, thanks for protecting me! And **Sika**, I am so ashamed of myself too! I am such a bad girl! And it wasn't a drabble, it was a full story called "Ten Things About You" I think you're talking about. n.n Heh, I think so anyway…Love yah!

Well, this is a continuation of "_Pandora's Box_", as requested by **CheeseFairyXXL**. So much angst, such a mouth, so much guilt in my part. _(dives into bomb shelter)_

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I hereby disclaim…that I don't own…eh…something…I dunno what though…

* * *

**Confrontation**

"Edward, where have you been?"

Edward stood silently on the opposite side of the room, face pale yet eyes reddened from lack of sleep. The dark circles were becoming even more visible than usual.

"Don't call me Edward. It's Fullmetal."

Roy raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

"I'm not a close to you anymore, remember? You let me go, remember? I'm not Edward to you anymore, remember?"

Roy rose from his desk. "What are you implying, Edward?"

"It's Fullmetal, damnit!" Edward seethed. "I won't be fooled this time."

Roy seemed to smirk. "Alright then, _Fullmetal_, what won't fool you?"

Edward stood stock still glaring yet there was pain visible in his eyes. "I was nothing but a toy to you, wasn't I? You're little **_sex _**toy, right?"

Riza and Havoc stood outside the office listening. Roy took notice of their presence so he quickly tried to cover it up. "No, you weren't a toy to me…"

"But all those other women in bed with you were?"

"Edwa--"

"You're nothing but a bastard, always have been, always will be. I hope you die and rot in hell, bastard. You fucked with the wrong person, you made a toy out of the wrong person, and don't call me Edward."

The boy turned and strode out of the office with tears pouring down his face. Riza and Havoc watched as he turned down the hallway not to be seen again. They looked back in towards Roy who now had a look of regret on his face.

'_How could I have sunk so low? He was right, I made him a toy…I'm sorry, Ed.'_

* * *

**A/N: **Story much sadder than I had intended. Blame it on the new song by Backstreet Boys called "Incomplete"! 0.0 _(hinthintPOKEShintIDEAstorygahnevermind)_ Too much sleep does weird things to people...as does lack of sleep... 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	36. Boyfriend

**A/N: **HavocFuery! GLEE! Okay, this is cute. n.n Promise, it's adorable. No angst. All happy-happy-joy-jo_--(pauses)…_shutting up now.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Always dress up your leftovers: one clever way is with top hats and canes.

* * *

**Boyfriend  
**"Havoc, why don't you have a girlfriend?" Edward absentmindedly flicked an already smoked cigarette only to have it slide on the desk a few inches. He scowled at it. 

"Because Mustang steals them all," Havoc murmured through his cigarette. He watched amusedly as Edward clapped his hands and transmuted the cigarette butt into a decent sized pebble. He watched the boy aim it and flick it and was rewarded by an '_Ouch, what the hell--FULLMETAL_!'

"Why don't you do something about it?" Edward snickered as Roy waved a fist at Edward and slammed the office door.

Havoc leaned back in his chair and flicked his cigarette into the ash tray. "Because I don't need a girlfriend anymore. I have someone now that Roy will _never _go for."

Edward looked over to Havoc. "Oh really? Some girl he dated that had threatened to castrate him if he tried to go near her?"

"Nope."

"Who?"

Fuery walked in with a stack of papers. Before anyone could react, Havoc pulled the young man onto his lap and instantly began nuzzling him. Fuery blushed as well as Edward.

"I've got my boyfriend."

* * *

**A/N: **So cute, neh? I couldn't resist having something happen to Roy. I just had to have Ed do something. n.n 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	37. Craving

**A/N: **HavocEd! Hey, just trying out random pairings. :P

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Don't rush me, I'll think of something.

* * *

**Craving**

Edward woke up with the strangest feeling…was it…a craving?

_A craving for what?_

He arrived at the office pondering what in the name of sanity he wanted…something tangy to the taste buds, something invigorating for the senses, something _new_.

"Morning, Boss."

"Morning, Havoc." Edward paused for a moment. He looked around to find that it was only him and Havoc in the office. Now was the perfect time to ask…

"Hey, Havoc, have you ever had cravings for something but not know what?"

Jean gave Ed a funny look and dropped his cigarette into the ash tray. "Uh, what type of cravings?"

The shorter blonde twiddled his fingers together. "I don't know, that's the thing. It's like I want something new, maybe something that I had a while ago but haven't had for a while--it's all confusing!"

"I sometimes get cravings for country food instead of cafeteria shit." Havoc said.

"Eh," Ed scratched his head, "I don't know…" He looked up to find Havoc standing directly in front of him with his hands on either side of him pinning him to the wall. "Eh, Havoc?"

Any further comments were cut off when a pair of lips pressed firmly onto his. His eyes widened as he felt a tongue snake into his mouth and began to explore him. Taking the moment, he explored the other man's mouth after a moment of encouragement.

Seconds later, Havoc broke away. "Well?"

"Damnit, now my craving's worse!" Edward grabbed Havoc's collar and pulled him back for another kiss. Havoc felt himself smile. He wondered whether it was the nicotine or the kisses Ed was craving.

* * *

**A/N: **EE! HAVOC! (_glomps_) 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	38. Promises

**A/N: **I realized that I haven't written any (except for 1) Rose/Ed for **StarryRavenFire**! EEP! _(smacks self) _Sorry my friend! Here yah go! n.n I was listening to the song "Frozen" by Madonna, which kinda got me into the mood for writing this. :P

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Love is a bird, she needs to fly. Let all the hurt inside of you die. You're frozen when your heart's not open.

* * *

**Promises  
**"You can't stay here." His voice was firm and defiant. He grabbed her wrist trying to drag her out of the broken down building on to have the girl yank her arm out of his grasp. 

"I can't leave, either, Edward." She spoke just as firmly. "There are too many people here that need my help. Too many children in need of a mother to protect them."

Edward eyed Rose for a moment before looking out the shattered wall seeing several children running down the dusty road carrying treasured items.

"I won't leave then. I'll stay here with you. I'll help you." He climbed over the rubble and began his decent towards the battle zone outside.

"You can't stay, you know you can't," Rose began as she followed him, "If the people in the military found out you were helping the enemy, it could cost you your title and life."

"I've done many things that would cost my life," he retorted, "They won't let me go because I'm too important to the military. I'm a strong character, a prodigy." He took her hand and helped her reach level ground. "I'm staying whether you like it or not."

Rose sighed. "Edward, you can't! I'll handle this. You have to go and find a way to restore both yours and your brother's bodies. You're wasting time here."

Edward stood in the crumbling doorway with downcast eyes. He peered outside for a moment before looking back to the girl. "Fine, I'll go. But, you have to promise me something."

"Yes?"

He held both of her hands as he looked firmly into her eyes. "Promise me that you'll leave here as soon as you can. Don't stay a moment longer than needed. Go to Rizembool, anywhere but here."

Rose nodded. "Agreed, but you have to promise me something."

"What?"

She laid her head on his shoulder. "Promise me that you both will be restored and you'll be waiting for me when this is over."

Edward stroked her hair. "I promise."

* * *

**A/N: **You don't know how hard it was to keep myself from ending this with an angst line like "Little did they know that that day would be their last in which they saw each other alive." Bad Racheal-chan! _(smacks self) _I have been a very bad person today, torturing Edward, and Roy, and now Rose! _(smacks self again) _I GOTTA stop reading those angst drabbles/stories! BTW, **StarryRavenFire**, there weren't any Rose/Ed before this one in this series. Just to let you know. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	39. Resisting Kittens

**A/N: **Ah, the power of fan fiction has struck again. In this drabble, Alphonse has been restored, kay-kay? Kay-kay. n.n You might even want to take it as implied Elricest. _(smacks self) _

Envy: --' You've been smacking yourself a lot lately.

Me: Yeah, well, I have a lot of things to smack myself for.

Envy: That sounded wrong.

Me: Pervert.

Envy: _(winks) _Who, moi? I learned it from the best.

Me: o.o You taught yourself?

Envy: ¬¬ I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Once you dig in, you'll find yourself having a good time.

* * *

**Resisting Kittens **

Edward had to admit that the kitten was adorable. The gold-gray mix with the wide gray eyes was just too adorable to say no to.

However, he had a reputation to be the stern older brother and was supposed to say no, even if this…cute, adorable kitten was just too much to let go.

As easy as it sounded to say no to some, it was very difficult with another set of grayish hued eyes staring back at you just as pathetically as the kitten's. The same gold-gray hair, perhaps a bit darker right in front of you on the one person that is just as fragile as a kitten.

"Please, nii-san?"

_A kiss on the cheek.  
_  
"I'm sorry, Aru."

_A peck on the lips.  
_  
"Aru, it's not going to work."

_A firm kiss on the lips and a slight hug.  
_  
"Aru--"

Any further interruption was stopped by the boy's lips connecting with the other's with tongues exploring unknown caverns.

A few days later, Edward picked up a collar from the store with the kitten's name and their address specially engraved on it.

* * *

**A/N: **Well, guess who won. XD 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	40. Man Eating Plant

**A/N: **Blame this one on my sister. It was her idea. She was watching one too many sci-fi movies. O.o Pretend that zippers were already invented also.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Er…yeah…don't own it. O.o

* * *

**Man Eating Plant**

"Fullmetal," Roy's eyebrow twitched, "What was that in the closest?"

Edward looked at him innocently. "Whatever are you talking about?"

_Insert angelic grin here on Edward's part._

"Edward, I saw something in there move, and it was _green_. What was it?"

Ed shrugged. "I don't know, a jacket fell from the hanger when I closed the door?" He suggested hopefully.

"Edward, jackets don't have teeth."

The boy smirked. "Ha! That's where you're wrong, the zippers on the jackets have teeth, therefore, jackets have teeth!"

"And tongues?"

Edward motioned to the upper part of the jacket Roy wore. "Have them too."

A growl came from the closet. Roy's eyes widened and Edward just backed away from the door.

"I don't remember jackets growling, Edward."

Ed began to push the man towards the office. "Me neither, let's go. The janitor can fend it off."

Unfortunately, it was poor Hawkeye who discovered the monster in the closet when she was in search of a mop to clean up the spill in the cafeteria. A scream came, which was soon followed by a chorus of bullets being fired.

Days later the man-eating plant that Ed had transmuted out of a simple head of cabbage was laid to rest in the vegetable patch in Roy's backyard. Grave marker included.

* * *

**A/N: **I was going to have it a weeee bit different towards the end. But I'm fine with it this way. 

Also, updates are going to start being fewer pretty soon. I haven't even started school and I've already gotten an assignment to write a freaking essay and my cursed English teacher wants us to make an oral presentation to the class. _(glares)_

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	41. Curiosity

**A/N: **I felt so bad for torturing Edward-kun so bad, I had to do something, ANYTHING, to lighten the mood between him and Roy again. 0.0 RoyEd, duh.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Be glad I don't own the show, cause there would be so much fluff you'd need an umbrella every day on your way to work/school…cause of forecasts of sudden showers of fluff…lots of fluff…yum…

* * *

**Curiosity**

"Tell me something, Fullmetal," Roy looked out his office window overlooking the courtyard with his back to the blonde, "have you ever been kissed?"

"Just by my mother when she was alive."

Roy raised an eyebrow. "Not even by the mechanic of yours?"

"No!" Edward bared his teeth and fumed. "Why would you care who's kissed me or who I've kissed?"

"Just curious. After all, a boy your age would normally have a girlfriend."

Ed crossed his arms. "Yeah, well, a boy my age wouldn't be in the military in search for the Philosopher's Stone to try to restore his and his brother's body."

Roy had to admit that the boy was right. He turned from the window and walked over to the couch and sat beside the boy whom was too busy staring off into space. "So, have you had any progress with it?"

"With getting a girlfriend?"

Roy shook his head with a chuckle. "No, I meant with your search. But, since you did bring it up--"

"Not much progress, and no, I haven't found anyone who I've become attracted to while I was gone." Ed continued to frown with a glazed over look in his eyes.

"Anyone ask you out?"

Ed snorted. "A couple chased me around asking for me to be their boyfriend, but I turned them down. And there were probably lots more that asked me out, but I was probably too busy to pay any attention to them."

"All girls?"

_A raised eyebrow.  
_  
Roy raised his hands. "Just curious."

"Curiosity killed the cat."

The man smirked. "Yeah, but I'm not a cat."

"You should've been born one." Ed rested his chin on the palm of his hand. "And no, they weren't all girls. Which, surprisingly, didn't freak me out at all."

"Oh?"

"Let me guess, you're curious as to why, weren't you?"

A grin appeared on Roy's face instead of the smirk. "Well, yeah."

"Because I'm--" Ed froze. "--ah Hell, this is going to sound very weird…"

"…"

"Alright," eyes seemed to be focused on an object that didn't even exist, "because the one person that I am attracted to just so happens to be male--"

_Blink. Blink._

Edward seemed to wait for another question. He closed his eyes and Roy could feel the air around Ed tense.

"Who?"

"Curious aren't you?"

"Well, yeah."

Edward turned so he faced Roy on the couch. "If you really must know, the person works in this building," a nod, "he's not a major," another nod, "and he knows alchemy," Edward began to crawl over to Roy and was inches away from his face, "and he's in this room."

Roy seemed to be at a loss for words. Edward smirked. "Curious as to why, eh?" Roy nodded. Edward placed his hands on both of Roy's shoulders. "How about I show you?"

"Show me then, I'm _very_ curious."

* * *

**A/N:** 0.o;;; I smell peaches for some reason. Peaches are goooooood. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	42. Flirt

**A/N: **OMG This idea just smacked me out of the blue. Eep! RizaEd! n.n

* * *

**Disclaimer: **Normality is for the not so strange.

* * *

**Flirt  
**"It's a nice day out, isn't it?" Roy leaned on the desk with a smug look on his face that clearly read _'I'm so hot and with this look you can't honestly suspect me of trying to oh-so calmly make you swoon so you come out on a date with me.' _

Riza looked up from her paperwork. She snorted softly as she picked them up and tapped them with irritation on the desk. "It's cloudy out, sir."

Roy's smirk decreased. "So it is." _New approach. _"So…are those new shoes?"

The female hid a smirk. "Nope. Had these for several years now."

_'Okay, that was embarrassing,' _Roy thought.

"Sir, if I may suggest," Riza stood up from her desk and placed the papers in a bin on the edge of the desk, "Please stop flirting with me."

Roy's jaw dropped. "Flirting, whatever are you talking about?"

"I know you, so stop flirting. I've already got a date, and he'll hurt you if you keep it up."

The dark haired man snorted. "Please, who's strong enough to fight me?"

The man felt a jab in the side and looked to find a disgruntled Edward. "I am, Colonel Bastard." He smiled over to Riza. "Are you ready?"

Riza grabbed her coat and was about to throw it over her arm when Edward took it for her. "Yes, Edward."

Edward took her hand and led her to the door, but before he left he turned and stuck his tongue out at Roy. He walked out laughing.

Roy was stunned. He then walked into his office and began to bang his head off the desk. _'THE PIPSQUEAK GOT A DATE WITH RIZA? SHE WENT WITH HIM INSTEAD OF ME? AAAH!'_

As if he had yelled it out loud, he heard Edward's voice echo from the ground below. "I AM NOT A PIPSQUEAK!"

* * *

**  
A/N: **Point for Edward-kun! 

Ed: YAY! _(dances jubilantly) _Take THAT Colonel Bastard! XP

Roy: _(still in shock) _I--I don't believe it! _(checks book on 'Roy's 101 Tips on Swooning Riza Hawkeye') _That should've worked!

Ed: Well, it probably would've worked if you had actually looked out the window once in a while and also didn't say about the shoes but said something about the new hair clip she was wearing.

Roy: 0.0;;;

Ed: n.n

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	43. Anywhere But Here

**A/N:** Sorry, no review replies except for two: **CheeseFairyXXL**, sorry about the lack of updates. 11th grade is very difficult, and being in High Honor and AP classes aren't helping any. I did manage to scribble this thought down during…what was it, French class? I honestly don't remember…**writerauthorguy**, I'll have that drabble request up as soon as I can. Most likely this weekend, if I'm lucky.

Anyway, this one has no real pairings, unless you want to squint and call it RoyEd.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Insert traditional smart-ass comment here. n.n

* * *

**Anywhere But Here**

_Fwoosh__  
_  
Lieutenant Hawkeye blinked as a blur of gold and red sped past her, sending nearby offices into desks, garbage cans, and into other officers.

_Zoom!  
_  
Another blur, this time gold and some blue, followed the previous blur. Riza could only blink again, and then exasperatedly threw her stack of papers onto the floor and plopped herself onto the nearby chair with a scowl.

---

Roy was laying peacefully on his couch in the office, trying to take a nap instead of working on paperwork. His door suddenly swung open and was closed a second later, with an alchemic blue flash following that. A gold blur flew over the couch and under his desk.

Roy was instantly awake now and was staring awkwardly at the now steel caged door. His gaze went over to the desk where on closer inspection; he discovered that the previously said blur was currently hiding.

He smirked. "So, Ed, what did you do to piss off Winry this time?"

* * *

**  
A/N:** XD Couldn't help it. Just came to me. It was amusing. Moreover, I wanted to let you all know I was alive and haven't forgotten y'all! 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	44. Voiceless

**A/N:** Okay, school plus really bad allergies that feel like a head cold plus Linkin Park plus CRACK! equals one really messed up story. Okay, it could also equal one really messed up writer, but that's not the point. No reviewer responses this time. _(keels over twitching)_ Allergies SUUUUCK!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** YOU MUST READ THE ADVENTURES OF ROY MUSTANG! It's a damn good story on Live Journal. n.n Heh, I fell in love with it. It was damn good…er…yeah…oO;

* * *

**Voiceless**

"My, Fullmetal how's the weather down there?"

Silence, except for the creaking of an automail hand.

"What! I can't quite hear you; you have to shout harder! I can't hear you from way down there!"

More silence, except for the loud thumping of an obviously ready to explode vein on the boy's temple.

Roy leaned forward and rested his chin on his intertwined fingers, flashing off his trademark smirk. "What's this? No snappy comments? Or has your temper finally grown? I'm sure that has to be, because obviously _you_ haven't grown an inch…"

Edward gritted his teeth and did a dance of rage. Sparks literally flew off his teeth as he grinded them.

_Man, laryngitis sucked._

* * *

**A/N:** XD No comment. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	45. Dentist

**A/N:** I can't really say that I've been slacking off with my fanfiction. I've been going writing crazy, just not posting it on here (because a lot of it I can't. XD I have to post it on AFN or in my GJ. :3), but expect many updates at random times. I have a series called "Office Drabbles" (FMA), I am debating whether I should post them or not. Do you want me to post them? Let me know in your reviews (IF YOU REVIEW).

I'm getting back into my writer's mode, so that means there are quite a few Roy/Ed drabbles until I get back in drabble writing and not full-fledged fics. (_Sweatdrops_So, yeah. Check my profile/homepage for updates.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own, never have, and never will…OH! CANDY!

* * *

**Dentist  
**"Ed, you have to go to the dentists." 

The persistent blonde shook his head vigorously as he clutched his throbbing jaw, but yelped after a second.

"That tooth won't heal on its own, Ed. Now come on." Roy reached out to grab the blonde's arm but the alchemist pulled away. "Ed, come on." He attempted to grab him again only to have his hand batted away.

"No!" A muffled cry came out as Roy lunged at him and grabbed his jaw.

There was a blue flash and an explosion.

-----

The dentist adjusted his glasses and leveled a glare at both men. "Now, you say that you…tripped?"

Roy nodded as he held an ice pack to his jaw and a bag of teeth in the other hand. Edward had a few minor scratches and looked slightly scorched, but otherwise, unharmed.

"Judging by the damage of your…fall…it looks like I'm going to have to yank out your remaining teeth and give you dentures," Edward cackled and Roy gaped, and another tooth fell out and onto the floor. This only caused the blonde to laugh harder.

"Now, you on the other hand, it looks like all you'll need is a filling. You have a slight cavity forming, so it won't take much."

Roy couldn't believe it. He didn't even need to go to the dentists in the first place, but after that brawl that left him nearly toothless, he ended up being the one with the worse condition.

When they get home tonight, Roy was going to knock out Ed's teeth. See how _he_ likes it having to put up with dentures.

* * *

**A/N:** Ever see those shows where one guy needs to go get a tooth checked and the other guy is perfectly fine and…yeah…nevermind… 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	46. Darling

**A/N:** Next drabble. I hope that it won't be as bad as the last one. This is actually a different pairing, and I blame Sky Dark from LJ for this. Ling/Ed. Yeah. I blame her. _(Glares, but then sighs and grins)._ They are cool together, like Roy and Ed.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**Darling  
**Ed had been called a variety of names in his time as State Alchemist by a variety of people. He's been known as a pipsqueak, a shorty, a shorty-little-pipsqueak, chibi, shrimp, Fullmetal Pipsqueak, and even, Miss. 

Never, in his entire career had he expected the next name…and it was given to him by a Xingian Prince!

"Hello, darling!" The man took Edward's flesh hand and kissed the top of it, rubbing his thumb on the blonde's callused skin. "It's a pleasure to meet you after seeing your face in so many pictures."

Edward swore he could hear Mustang laughing at him from the next room. Him, Havoc, and even Riza.

"So, are all State Alchemists pretty like you?"

Ed blushed. "Er…uh…"

"Pretty?" Roy chuckled as he walked into the room with his Lieutenants in tow. "I don't know about pretty…"

Ling smiled. "All well. I believe it must come with only the most talented of people." He kissed Edward's hand again, but this time began traveling up his arm. "So, darling, are you free this evening? How about tomorrow? How about all this week?"

Ed closed his eyes, taking deep breaths to regain his dignity somewhat. "I, uh, well, uh—"

Roy leaned in towards Edward and snickered. "I think he believes you are a woman, Fullmetal _dear_."

"Please, tell me what your real name is." Ling fluttered his eyelashes. "I have heard that you are called 'Fullmetal'. Tell me, is there another name in which you are called?"

"E-Edward," he stuttered.

Ling's smile only deepened. "Edward, such a pretty name for such a pretty boy. Meet me later, darling, and we can discuss the future for our countries."

As if he knew that Roy would taunt Edward for the events, Ling turned towards Roy and scowled. "Mess with my Edward and you will be held accountable and let there be war!" He hmphed before turning back to Edward and waved with a grin as he exited.

Edward stood stock still, not being able to comprehend what had just happened.

Roy stood still as well. That was, until Riza leaned towards him and murmured loud enough for both him and Ed to hear, "I do believe that this means you can't pick on Edward and his new name, sir. Because, as you may have heard, the fate of our countries rest in his hands."

"That doesn't mean I can't get one of you guys to do it _for_ me." The smirk.

"ANYONE PICKS ON MY DARLING WILL BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE AND WILL BE PUNISHED!" Ling's voice sung through the hallways.

Edward had to resist all temptation to chase after the man and kiss him for putting that look on Roy's face.

* * *

**A/N:** No comment. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	47. Home

**A/N:** Been a bit, eh? I am going to officially post the office drabbles on here for everyone. :3 As soon as I get the 50 drabbles posted on here, I will upload five of them tonight…I hope. XP

This drabble is actually not very humorous, and I sort of apologize for that in advance. I am sorry!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**Home**

Clear blue skies above and crisp green grass below. People going back and forth in a hustle and bustle from behind, and endless plains in front.

A breeze blew the golden bangs from in front of his eyes as he scanned his scenery. Not much has changed, which was a good thing. He didn't think he could handle having him home change as much as the city had.

Walking up the dirt path with a suitcase in hand, he approached the familiar building with a determined gaze. It was real, it was very real, and it wasn't just another illusion like the one he had seen for the past two years.

He saw a blonde haired figure in the garden off to the side of the house, along with a shorter grey haired figure working alongside. He also noted that there was another person, whom had a long, dark blonde ponytail, was talking with a woman who had familiar pink bangs and dark toned skin.

The shortest of the figures just happened to turn with a sigh and caught his gaze. He waved nervously as she took a startled step back, but squinted her eyes. A gasp left her mouth.

"Edward?"

The other figures looked over in surprise, and one of them charged at him.

"Brother!"

A pair of arms wrapped around him and squeezed the air out of his lungs. He wrapped his arms around the figure and nestled his head into the dark gold hair.

"Al, you're—restored—"

"All thanks to you, brother." The boy looked up with tearing eyes.

Edward smiled.

He was finally home.

* * *

**A/N:**_ (Buried in fluff.)_

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	48. Hoola

**A/N:** I have no idea where this came from. But all I have to say is enjoy! n.n'

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own...except...maybe...nah...never mind.

* * *

**Hoola**

Winry's eyes nearly popped out of her head when her lifelong friend stepped into the room after a bit of coaxing on the Colonel's part. After regaining some sort of composure, she instantly jabbed a fist into her mouth and began to snicker like mad.

Roy brushed past Edward and seated himself on the couch next to the blonde with a smile. "Well, Miss Rockbell? What do you think?"

She plucked the fist from her mouth and laughed. "Oh my gosh! It's—it's—"

Ed groaned. "Please don't say it."

"It's—it's so—"

Ed covered his face with his hands. "Please don't."

"IT'S SO CUTE!" She jumped up and began to swing her hips and her arms in the fashion of Hawaiian dancers.

Ed's face turned so red, that it was almost as brown as the coconuts he wore as a bikini top.

He looked at Roy and pointed a finger threateningly. "I hate you."

* * *

**A/N:** n.n Hee. I've been reading too many crack fics on Live Journal. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	49. Bored

**A/N:** Another drabble. wh00tage.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** (_Is seen holding up a sign.)_ Will work for fan-fiction. But too lazy to actually do the work. Nyah. So people, get updating out there. :P

* * *

**Bored**

Envy laid on his stomach kicking his legs in the air watching the scene below. It was very amusing, yet, at the same time, uninteresting. On the ground below was a group of people, whom he had taken for as higher up workers—and were chatting and fighting amongst themselves. He snorted as one of them held out a hand with his fingers poised for a snap. He raised an eyebrow and snorted.

"What the hell is a freaking _snap_ going to do?"

"Well," a voice said behind him, "that is Mustang—the Flame Alchemist—whom can create sparks by snapping his fingers." It was Ed, who was glaring at the homunculus. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Came for some entertainment, but I'm bored now."

"Is that so," Ed raised a hand to his chin and rubbed it. "Interesting..."

There was a long pause.

"Envy, just how bored are you?"

Envy looked over to the alchemist who was grinning like a psychotic cat. "Eh?"

"I was just curious, because if you're bored, I'm sure that I can find something that will—cure it."

-----

Mustang growled in annoyance as the officers split up and went into different directions. What the hell was wrong with these people! Why the hell did they start a dispute over which way the toilet paper was put on the toilet paper ring! If there was anyone to fight with about, it was with the janitors.

He turned and marched up to the building with agitation. However, he was glad to be going inside so he could annoy one certain chibi alchemist who had just arrived in the city to turn his weekly report—

_Splat._

Roy cringed and blinked as he felt something explode on impact on his head. Something cold and wet seeped into his clothes as well as down his back. He looked up to find nothing there. Running a gloved hand over his head, he picked off bits of elastic—

_Wait, elastic? _

_SPLAT! POP! FWOOSH! GARGLE!_

Roy was bombarded by hundreds of water balloons that were seemingly raining from the sky. Coughing and spluttering, he tried to run inside only to slip on the wet cement all fall on his back, be bombed on the chest and face with even more toy weaponry.

Up on the roof, Envy was having the time of his life chucking the water balloons at the man. "You're right, _o-chibi-san, _this is fun!"

Ed grinned as he brought over another bucketful of water balloons and was soon followed by Havoc and Fuery, who were also carrying buckets of the weapon. "See? Anything is fun when it involves Mustang getting his ass beaten by water."

* * *

**A/N:** I'm sorry for torturing Mustang. It was just I needed to get some...'rage' out if you will...blame a story on LJ. It just got me uberly pissed and I wanted revenge. (_­Cackles._) But don't worry, I'm working on a cute RoyEd one-shot that'll be sure to get some fluff spewing. :P 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	50. Date

**A/N:** One sided Ling/Ed and there is both sided RoyEd.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I dun own.

* * *

**Date**

"Please!"

"No!" Ed yanked back his jacket that was being tugged by the Xing Prince.

"Why not?" The Prince wailed as he yanked at the jacket again.

"I've already got plans! With someone else!" Ed growled, hoping anytime soon that the person he had plans with would waltz through the door and save him from the menace.

"Who?" Ling asked innocently and curiously.

"ME." Ling looked up and Ed just about squealed with joy.

Roy stood scowling in the doorway. "I would appreciate it if you kept your hands off my _date._"

Ed took that as his cue and bee-lined across the room and hid behind Roy, clinging to his backside. With that, Mustang turned and wrapped an arm around the boy and walked out silently.

Ling pursed his lips and clenched his hands into fists. "You may have won the battle, but you have not won the war." He grinned evilly, and cackled.

Havoc walked into the room and saw the cackling man only to turn around and leave. It was bad enough to have Ed and Roy cackling like that every so often, and it was bad enough they had a woman here who like to pet guns. They did **not **need a psychotic foreigner.

"Fuery, let's go get a beer." With that, he grabbed his buddy and dragged the man out the door.

* * *

**A/N:** Meh, strayed from topic. All well. (_shrugs)._

-**Mint Pizza Queen**


	51. First Kiss

**A/N:** I must stop reading crack on LJ.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**First Kiss**

It had been his first kiss, stolen by the one man that he 'hated' since he laid eyes on him for the very first time in Resembool. It had been his first, yet it wasn't bad.

It started off sweet and slow, barely grazing each other's lips in a feathery fashion. It then rose to the next level with Roy slowly coaxing the boy by pressing the lips firmly onto the blonde's own.

Slightly taken back, Edward almost backed away had it not been for Roy clinging to him so possessively.

The kiss deepened when Ed felt something graze out of Roy's mouth and he tried to break the kiss. However, when Roy rubbed his back in _that spot_, he instantly melted into a puddle of goo and they took that simple kiss to the next level.

After what seemed like hours, Roy broke away and grinned at Ed, who was still in a state of oblivion. "Well?"

"Huh?" Ed asked with a dreamy look.

"Nothing," and Roy stole his lips in another kiss.

* * *

**A/N:** I have got to stop reading stuff on LJ. That's the only way to get me to work. XP 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	52. Mistletoe

**A/N:** Had to have seen this one coming. The upcoming holiday season, of course you did...you did, didn't you? _(Eyes audience warily.)_ You didn't, did you? oO'

* * *

**Disclaimer:** It's the most wonderful time of the year! SANTA! _(Chases after.)_ COME BACK! RUDOLPH, SLOW DOWN!

* * *

**Mistletoe**

Ed stared at the green foliage that hung above their heads unblinkingly. Okay, so he was blinking—but just barely. He was in shock, mind you, from the little conversation that he had with his commanding officer.

"Edward," first, it was scary that he was using his first name and not his issued name, "we're standing under mistletoe."

Second, it was scary that Mustang would actually allow something like that be put in _his _office. This is Roy Mustang, people!

"Yeah, so?"

This is what got Ed the most.

"It's only tradition to kiss under mistletoe." Roy smirked, yet there was a glint to his eye that suggested '_oh yeah, so looking forward to meeting those lips'. _

Edward's brain suddenly stopped functioning, and did its last 'kaput' as his jaw almost slammed into the floor. Instead of backing off and running down the hallway screaming obscenities, he stood stock-still.

Roy took this to his advantage and slowly leaned in.

The other officers in the room inhaled sharply and got into sprinting position.

Roy's lips pressed a chaste kiss and was about to break it when he felt arms wrap around his neck and pull him forward, preventing him from running away.

So what if he was in shock two minutes ago. So what if they are kissing. So what if they making the other officers in the room pass out in shock. Edward decided he liked Roy's lips and didn't want them to leave his anytime soon, thank you very much.

* * *

**A/N:** Yeah...candy canes do that to you. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	53. Doctors

**A/N:** Another drabble. oO'

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I know you, from Yaoi Fans Gone Wild, right?

* * *

**Doctors**

"I'm not going."

"Ed, please be reasonable—"

"It's just a scratch." Ed assured with very little convincing done on Roy.

"Just a scratch?" Roy windmilled his arms. "Edward! You need stitches! That cut is a good inch and a half deep and if you don't get it looked at, you could lose your arm! There's stinking glass in it! How did you even end up with this anyway?"

Ed gave him a look that said 'So? It's not as if it matters to me, I've already lost one arm, what's another? And what makes you think I'm going to tell you anything?'

"Edward," Roy growled as he grabbed the bleeding arm and pressed a cloth to it to stop the bleeding. "Please just go."

"I'm not going. You can't force me to go by ordering either, bastard, cause I'll just do what I've done any other time."

Roy sighed as he kneeled beside Ed to inspect the wound himself. He looked up to Ed again with pleading eyes and spoke softly. "I wasn't going to use my authority to make you go; I was going to ask you to go—for me—"

Ed turned pale. 'Oh no he isn't—'

"—and for your brother—"

The blonde clenched his teeth. 'Damnit! He did!'

"Fine, I'll go, only for you guys." Ed looked away angrily, but felt something pressed up to his cheek and pull away just as fast. He held up an automail hand to his cheek, but knew it was fruitless to try to feel what it was.

"Thank you, Edward. That'll make me and your brother feel better." Roy leveled a smile. Ed just glared.

Later that night in the hospital, Ed learned that in fact, if he hadn't gone to the hospital to get his arm checked and treated, he would've lost more than just his arm.

* * *

**A/N:** Scary but true, this happened to a friend of mine. Had glass in the arm, got into a vein, and almost killed her. It would've went throughout her bloodstream and eventually to her heart. O.o Scary. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	54. Magnet

**A/N:** It's been too long since I've written one with Envy, neh?

Envy: Damn right! _(Pouts)_

Sorry about that…

Envy: I want my lawyer. This is character abuse!

I said I was sorry…

Envy: You'll be hearing me in court!

What about this story? You're with Ed!

Envy:…I'll see you in court AFTER this story.

…alrighty then.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own, therefore, Envy can't sue! 

Envy: Watch me.

* * *

**Magnet**

Envy picked up the item and examined it carefully. It was square, almost black, but it had a slight glint to it. It wasn't very heavy, but it would leave a nasty knot on someone's head if he were to use it in a slingshot.

He grinned evilly and dashed down the alleyway only to trip and sent his prized possession flying in the air—

--and had it stick to a light pole.

He blinked.

The object sat on the same spot.

Getting up, Envy lurched at his prize and grinned again.

'_Would it work? Would it would it would it? And would it be worth to have his face pummeled into mush?'_

Only one way to find out—

_Find the test subject._

-----

"Oi, chibi-san!"

Ed instantly twirled and spat angrily. "WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL—"

"Shut up, I need to test something." Envy circled Edward who was staring at him curiously.

"Uh—"

"Pull up the sleeve to your right arm."

Blinking but complying, Ed pulled up his sleeve and looked up for more instructions.

Envy took out the prize and held it next to the automail. It instantly became attracted to it and stuck to the arm like a leech.

Ed gaped and shot Envy a leveled glare. "Bastard!"

Envy grinned. "Cool! Your automail attracts magnets!"

Maybe it wasn't worth having his face pummeled into mush.

But the expression on his face _was _well worth it.

* * *

**A/N:** I miss writing for Envy. He's a riot to write for. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	55. Eavesdropping

**A/N:** Another drabble. I'm on a roll tonight. n.n

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**Eavesdropping**

Havoc wasn't an eavesdropper, honest. He just happened to overhear things by accident. Honest, it was all by accident and it just happened to be pure coincidence that each time he was caught that it was just an accidental overhearing and it was a misunderstanding.

"Over my aunt's clubfoot," Riza had said to that. Then, Havoc was met with a shower of bullets when he asked if Riza's aunt did have, in fact, a clubfoot.

However, that was last week, and today, Havoc was a changed man. He would try to avoid these mishaps at all costs—

--but that was no excuse for why he was leaning against the Colonel's office, an ear on the door and a cigarette popped into his mouth dangling precariously.

"Havoc," a stern voice came from behind him.

Havoc shot up. "Er—Hawkeye, I was just—"

"Move over."

Havoc gaped as Riza dropped to her knees beside him, leaning in with an ear and a finger to her lips.

"Hawkeye—" He began but was interrupted.

"Shush," she growled lowly, "I want to hear if my theory proves correct."

Havoc gave her a funny look. "What theory?"

"The one about Colonel Mustang and Major Elric being a couple."

The cigarette in Havoc's mouth dropped to the ground and rolled away.

* * *

**A/N:** n.n' Heh... 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	56. Explanations

**A/N:** Regarding the drabble _Doctors_, I present to you part two to it with an explanation as to what happened to Ed and yeah...

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Happy Early Christmas! Now, where's the eggnog?

* * *

**Explanations**

Ed felt a pair of arms wrap around him in a comforting manner, trying to shield out the evil of the world. He felt the man's warmth penetrate through the hospital gown, warming his chilled and weak body. He hugged Roy back, closing his eyes as he fought back the urge to cry.

He had done it.

He had told Roy.

He had told him about the showdown between him and Envy, which ended surprisingly quick due to unexpected circumstances involving the surprise visit from Lust, who snapped off and stopped the two.

He had told him how Envy shoved aside the fellow homunculus and punched him, kicked him, and threw across the grounds.

He also had told Roy how Lust tried to reason with Envy not to kill the boy, to remember their 'plan'.

He had paused when he had to describe the scene where Envy took an entire chunk of a wall; window included, and threw at both Ed and Lust in a fit of rage.

He had to calm Roy and assure him that he didn't take most of the blunt force of the impact, except for the glass that flew at him and penetrated his arm. Lust, in fact, had thrown herself in front of Edward to take most of the blunt force, which pissed off Envy even more.

The fight, Edward had recalled, was mostly between Lust and Envy, Lust being the distraction for Edward and allowed him to escape.

When Ed had inhaled to continue his story, Roy had shushed him with a finger to the lips and a frown. This had lead to this moment, in which Ed was enveloped in strong arms, clinging to him.

Let there be not anymore explaining, just the comfortable, companionable silence.

* * *

**A/N:** O.o Eeeeeck... 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	57. Spider

**A/N:** _(Insert rambling)_...and so I says, wtf, and what if this happened to Havoc and Fuery when they got a pet spider...

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**Spider**

"KILL IT! SQUISH IT! QUICK, GIVE ME A NEWSPAPER!"

Havoc bellowed as he climbed on top of Roy's desk. Roy raised an eyebrow and shoved him off, paperwork and all, and smirked as Havoc let out a girlish scream and scrambled across the room and climbed up the curtains onto the windowsill.

Fuery was skittering around with a glass jar and lid making cooing noises, trying to calm down his friend and at the same time, catch the critter.

Roy leaned back in his chair to enjoy the spectacle. He would've helped, but, well, he wasn't one to interrupt when people were doing _so well _on their own...

Havoc twitched as the arachnid scampered across the floor, over the mounds of paperwork and made its way up the wall to him. He screeched when the spider began to crawl on his boot, and with a swift kick, sent it (along with the boot) flying across the room.

Fuery watched in horror as his beloved pet flew off the boot and landed on the floor. As if taunting, time slowed down and Fuery watched as Havoc's boot landed on top of the spider, instantly squishing it.

Roy chortled with evil glee.

Havoc fainted in relief.

Fuery sobbed, calling out to the spider.

"FREDERICK!"

Later that day, in an attempt to comfort Fuery, Hawkeye forced Havoc to get Fuery a new spider. Oh, and he had to give the spider a proper burial.

* * *

**A/N:** Frederick! No! Squishy. oO; 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	58. Shooting Stars

**A/N:** Been a while since I've updated this series, hasn't it? O.o; Sorry. This one is a sad RoyEd one.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Shooting Stars**  
_"You know, Edward, they say that when you see a shooting star, any wish you make when you see it will come true." _

Edward inhaled softly as he and Roy rocked back and forth gently on the porch swing. "That's what they say, but does it actually work?"

Roy shrugged. "Honestly, I've never had a chance to see a shooting star, so I've never actually got to try it out. But when I do, I already know what I want my wish to be." He looked down and smiled at the blond.

Edward smiled back and they leaned in towards each other.

"That's all in the past, Edward, stop thinking about that!"

Edward slammed his head against the cold window in his Munich home. It has been a year since he arrived in this place, and now, during the season, was the worst time for him to be thinking about his home world.

Just then, something caught his eye. He stared hard out the window at the sky, focusing on the light.

_'...a shooting star...'_

_'...make a wish...'_

Edward closed his eyes and listened to Roy's voice speaking to him. _Make a wish. Don't let this opportunity let you by._

There was so many things he could've wished for, but on this very night,the one thing he wished most for was just for one moment, one glance, one last time...he could see Roy's face again.

But only when the shooting stars come.

* * *

**A/N:** Meep. Oo' My guilt has overwhelmed me. I shall go write some comedy. Maintenant. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	59. Reunion

**A/N: **Well, this was requested by **new moongirl**, and it was a very good idea. So, here I go...happy EdRoy fic that is a continuation of _Shooting Stars. _Note: I've seen the movie, and this is **NOT** what happens in it. Just to let you know, kay? Good.

**

* * *

Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.**

* * *

**

**Reunion**

_'...any wish you make...will come true...'_

_'I already know what I want my wish to be.'_

Edward knew what he wanted for a wish. He already wished for it. Months again. Yet nothing happened.

Disheartened, he continued to 'live' his life in this Hell, waiting for the moment where possibly, just maybe, it may come true...

And it did.

It was all a blur, happening oh-so quickly. Just as it had started, it had ended, and he found himself in a field. It was dark, nighttime, which surprised him.

He wandered around aimlessly, lost in his own thoughts as to where he was, what happened, and what was he going to do now, until a blinding light found his eyes.

"Who goes there?"

Ed held an arm up to cover his eyes. His prosthetic arm glinted off the light.

The light sank and Edward blinked owlishly.

"E-Edward?"

The light the man had been holding fell to the ground and was extinguished. Ed stood stock still in the dark as he suddenly felt a set of arms wrap around him.

"I knew it would come true." He recognized the voice and clung to Roy. "I knew that my wish would come true. I just didn't know when..."

"Roy," Roy pulled back and looked at Edward who was smiling, "there's a shooting star."

"I saw, but I don't need to make a wish right now." Roy leaned in towards him and placed a kiss on his forehead. "My wish has already come true."

* * *

**A/N:** I heard an explosion far off somewhere...I think it was a fluff bunny. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	60. January

**A/N:** On Spring Break but I haven't done didley-squat. oO' Here's the month series.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.**

* * *

****January**

January, the month in which the year is started fresh. All disputes or feuds became bygones, and new battles sprung up like weeds. Promises and vows were made only to be broken or forgotten for the rest of the year, and this was the month in which most people were still getting over from the sudden spending of all their money on booze and/or presents.

Riza took all her resolutions to heart. Really, she did. Her previous resolutions were simple; get a promotion, get the Taisa to do his paperwork a little quicker, and even get better with her weaponry. Although the second resolution was fairly hard to achieve, she did it fairly well with the aid of the third.

This year, however, she didn't have much really planned for to start the year. She had done everything she really wanted, and the rest of the things that she did want accomplished would take more than a year to do.

There was one thing that did nag her in the depths of her mind. A certain blonde's face anyway.

As much as she hated to admit it, she knew she was developing feelings for the boy, and knew that he was growing somewhat attached to her as well.

So here she sat on her couch in her living room in front of the crackling fireplace with him seated by her side. Both were snuggled up close with a single quilt covering them. Her hair was out of its usual bun and his was out of the traditional braid. Golden hair flowed onto shoulders.

How did she end up in this sweet bliss? Simple, a New Year's Resolution that involved asking Edward out.

_Resolution completed.

* * *

_

**A/N:** Eh, I feel all fluffy. n.n'

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	61. February

**A/N:** Second installment in the month series.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**February  
**"Oh Ed," Winry bounded up to Edward with a huge grin on her face. "Guess what today is..." She giggled and bounced up and down in place. 

Ed stared at her for a second before going into deep thought. It wasn't Valentine's Day, that was for sure. It wasn't Groundhog Day. Was it her birthday? No, that's already passed. Is it someone else's birthday? Oh boy, he was doomed to the wrench if he didn't remember and quickly...

"Do you give up?" She smiled sweetly.

The alchemist took a swift step away from her. "If I say yes, will you beat me with your wrench?"

"No! Silly, do I look like I would hit you with a wrench?"

"You _always _look like you're gonna hit me with one."

She was about to whip out her wrench, but stopped herself and allowed her irritation to be seen through a twitching of an eye. "Well, _anyway, _today is February 4th, also known as 'Dump Your "Significant Jerk" Day'."

Ed eyed her suspiciously. "Is that so?"

She nodded. "So, are you going to dump Roy Mustang and go with me?"

He placed a hand on his chin thoughtfully, building up suspense. He watched as Winry bounced up and down in place anxiously, waiting until she couldn't take it anymore.

"Nope." With that, he walked off to find his 'Significant Jerk' with Winry staying behind, fuming.

* * *

"Do you know what today is?" Ed snuggled up with Roy on the couch and waited for a moment for Roy to respond. 

"No, what?"

"Well, today is 'Dump Your "Significant Jerk" Day'..."

"Is that so?" Roy eyed him suspiciously.

Ed wrapped his arms around Roy and nestled into his chest. "My thoughts exactly."

* * *

**A/N: **I got the idea to write this one after reading a Reader's Digest (which I also don't own!) and it was talking about holiday's in February. I was amused after finding this one. :P  
**  
-Mint Pizza Queen**


	62. March

**A/N: **Next installment of the month series. Little warning: Language.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**March**

"Ed..."

"Absolutely not."

"Ed..."

"Go to Hell, Mustang."

"Fullmetal..." Long pause. "Fullmetal, as your superior officer, I am ordering you to do this."

"Well, as an insubordinate subordinate, I say shove it up your ass." Ed crossed his arms and put his back to his commanding officer, and soon to be ex-boyfriend if he kept his shit up.

"Come on, Ed," Mustang placed reassuring hands on both of the boy's shoulders and leaned in towards one ear, "it's just for the day. Please?"

"No. Get Fuery to do it."

"Fuery's not sho—not the right height." Ed applauded Roy for his catching of the tongue, but it wouldn't save him from getting his ass kicked. "Oh come on Ed! Please!"

"Here's an idea, why don't you do it?"

"Ed, I said before you're the only one the right height for it."

"Bullshit."

Roy scowled at the very determined kid and then a malicious grin swept across his face. "Fine, if you won't do it willingly, I'll force you into the thing with a little help from your brother."

Ed turned to him with a scowl of his own. "My brother wouldn't betray me like that."

"Wouldn't he?" Roy nodded and Ed turned just in time to see an alchemic flash go off.

* * *

"YOU BOTH ARE GOING TO FUCKING DIE. ESPECIALLY YOU MUSTANG FOR CORRUPTING MY LITTLE BROTHER!" 

"Ed! Language!" Riza brought out her pistol and aimed it at his head.

Havoc, being a brave and sympathetic lad for Ed, leaped out in front of the gun and held up his arms. "Hawkeye! Guns!"

Hawkeye tucked it away with a leveled glare.

"Sorry to hear about—you know."

"I'll accept your apology if you get back my arm and untie me."

Havoc grinned. "Can't do that Ed. Colonel's orders are for no one to release you until the kids got to see the leprechaun and that he did his impression for them."

Ed squirmed in his leprechaun outfit. "Well, can you do just two things for me?"

"Depends, what are they?"

"Take off this fake beard and shove it down Mustang's throat for me."

"Sure thing!" There was a rip as it was ripped off of skin.

"OW! THAT HURT!"

"Sorry, Ed. Now, where is that Colonel..."

* * *

**A/N: **Ed + leprechaun outfit equals OMG CUTE. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	63. April

**A/N:** Here's the fourth installment in the month series.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**April**

It was another dreary day. Gray clouds flooded the skies releasing an endless rain upon the city, causing its citizens to rush around with umbrellas, or the less fortunate with newspapers and magazines, over their heads.

Roy stared out his window boredly. His desk was overrun with millions of sheets of paperwork, and quite frankly, he was not in the mood to be signing his name repeatedly on any of them.

While everyone was off to lunch, Roy was stuck back at his office (Riza's orders) and was supposed to be working on all back paperwork. Why should he when no one else does?

He sighed and scrunched his face up against the cold window, but backed away when the flash of red and gold caught his eye.

_'Could it be? Back so soon? Yes! It is!'_

Roy leaned back in his chair and twirled in it joyfully. He failed to notice Riza and Havoc standing in the doorway staring.

"What's he so excited about?"

"Ed's back."

"Ooh."

* * *

**A/N: **Meh, short and sweet. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	64. May

**A/N:** Fifth installment in the month series.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**May**

There were several ways to tell whether or not May had finally crossed paths with you.

The first was the warmer weather. The sun was out longer, heating up the cool earth, melting any remaining snow and making mini-puddles in the dirt road often walked on.

The next were the flowers. A lot of brightly colored flowers came out to say hello to the world, greeting each person with a gentle wave in the warm spring breeze.

Another were the animals. Squirrels and other small rodents had come out to investigate after their long winter absence, to see what has changed during that duration of winter. The birds had come back and were singing their hearts out to the world.

The last thing was the one thing that Winry cherished most. She'd be working in the kitchen when the stomping of boots on the front stoop reached her ears, the clicking of a turning door handle, followed by a male voice announcing his presence.

"Hey, Winry, I'm back."

The blond would turn and meet the remaining Elric brother and would smile.

May always bring spring, but it also brought back hope.

* * *

**A/N: **Off to update more. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	65. June

**A/N: **The sixth installment in the month series.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.**

* * *

****June**

The once comfortable temperatures left the world, allowing the more aggressive heat to overcome in its place. June brought along hot, sticky weather with a sure sign of stormy weather. Any chance of skipping out to the beach would be cut short by a sudden lightning storm or because any beaches were closed due to 'repairs and cleanup'.

Office life became unbearable just as the outside world. With no air conditioners installed yet, and the janitors and other workers hard at work trying to fix them so they would be ready to use, the windows were flung open only to welcome in intolerable humid air.

Normally placid officers would get edgy and snappy, but the already cranky officers were often sent away for some R & R as to avoid being shot, stabbed to death, or alchemized into something unpleasant. People often acted in such a harsh manner to get away from the work area and go chill in their own home pools.

Of course, Riza saw right through Roy's own attempts to get sent away. She made quite sure that no one under his jurisdiction or him for that fact were allowed to leave...no matter what.

Roy didn't need to try to be bitchy after that.**

* * *

**

**A/N: **No comment. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	66. July

**A/N:** The seventh installment to the series.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**July**  
If people thought June was mean, July was a tyrant. Sweltering temperatures that caused people to see ice creams when really there was a hot dog stand, July was a tormentor within itself. 

While June actually offered some relief with a breeze, July had no breeze. The air was stagnant and almost choking.

The sun blazed almost constantly, boring down on innocent victims who ended up looking like broiled lobsters at the end of the day.

But July brought along something that June couldn't...July brought beach parties, and pool parties.

Even though she vowed she wouldn't, Riza would always succumb to the unbearable heat and allow the fellow officers to dash off and chill in a much cooler environment. Often very thankful for her actions, Roy's fellow subordinates would invite her along with them to the beach or to a local pool house with air conditioning so they could all enjoy the weather.**

* * *

**

**A/N: **No comment. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	67. August

**A/N:** The next installment in the month series.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I don't own.

* * *

**August**

"Ice cream!"

"Milkshakes!"

"Lemonade!"

"No, ice cream!"

"I say milkshakes!"

"You're both idiots! A hot day deserves lemonade!"

"_Ice cream!"_

"_Milkshakes!" _

_"LEMONADE!"_

"What's the problem here?" Enter in Roy Mustang, looking mightily perturbed and very hot from the August sun.

Havoc waved a flier for a restaurant serving ice cream for more scoops but at a lower price. "We're trying to decide what to get, and I say we go here for ice cream! They got fifty new flavors!"

"What? Chocolate, chocolate vanilla? Chocolate vanilla strawberry?" Breda snorted. "Please, hardly new. They're the same flavors...as always. I say we go for milkshakes."

"Milkshakes cost more than ice cream! See the prices right here!" Havoc shoved the paper into Breda's face. Breda showed Havoc what he thought of the prices by proceeding to eat the flier. Havoc gaped.

Roy ignored the two of them and looked to the third person. "Well, what's your story?"

Fuery shifted nervously on his feet. "Well, I said we should go for lemonade...since I was a kid I'd go for lemonade with my folks, so I'd thought...well, I'd keep on doing it."

"I don't like lemonade!" Breda and Havoc both grumbled agitatedly.

The Colonel rolled his eyes and sighed. "Well, I hate to say this...but all three of your are wrong..."

Three sets of eyes focused on him, curiosity filled them to the brim. "Wha--"

"On a hot day, such as this, one needs to cool off in a pool..."

Breda rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Hn, you have a point...that does sound good..."

"...with Edward Elric."  
_  
"WE'RE NOT TALKING ABOUT YOUR STYLE OF COOLING OFF!" _All three bellowed, faces burning red at just what the Colonel was implying.

Roy shrugged. "Fine. You don't know what you're missing out on." But if they didn't really want to join him, he wasn't complaining. After all, he would have Ed all to himself.**

* * *

**

**A/N: **_(Sweatdrops.)  
__  
_**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	68. September

**A/N:** Three more to go in the month series after this one.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I don't own FMA.**

* * *

****September**

"Just think, Roy! Tomorrow she'll be starting school! My daughter! In kindergarten!" Roy could see Hughes gushing over the phone, with probably six or seven volumes of photos tucked under each arm and all of them filled with Elysia in her school outfit with her pink backpack and jacket.

"I can't wait! I am sooooo excited!" Hughes squealed into the phone.

Roy put a hand to his temple and sighed. "Hughes, I have a question for you..."

"Yes, Roy?"

"Who's the one starting school, you or Elysia?"

There was a pause, followed by a sarcastic laugh. "Ha ha, very funny, Roy."

"Well," Roy fingered his finger, "you're acting much more excited than Elysia. I know you're excited to use about twenty to thirty rolls of film on her first day, but take it easy. You'll break the camera."

"See, Roy, that's where I'm ahead of you..." Roy stared off into space as Hughes cackled into the phone. "I bought a few more cameras just in case this one broke."

Roy laughed loudly. "I should have know better with you, Maes. Just remember, this is her first day of school. It's not like she's becoming the Fuhrer or anything."

"Oh, I'll be prepared for that too. I'll have more cameras by then and I'll have a truckload of film waiting."

Roy stared into the phone, then slowly placed it onto the cradle. He should've expected this from Hughes around this time of year.**

* * *

**

**A/N:** None. Except Hughes being gushy over Elysia is so cute.  
**  
-Mint Pizza Queen**


	69. October

**A/N: **Only a few more in the month series. Here's the next installment.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.**

* * *

****October**

Autumn had finally decided to show its face upon Central. The leaves began to change into their bright colors of red, orange, and yellow, and the air had begun to get cooler as the days progressed.

The fall plants, such as the mums, squash, and pumpkins, littered the stands, waiting to be bought by families in celebration of the harvesting season.

"Oh look! A pumpkin!" Elysia squealed as her dad drove past a pumpkin stand. Instantly, he hit the brakes, and threw the car into reverse.

"Honey! Be careful!" Gracia warned him with a panicked look on her face.

"Don't worry! I'm an expert at this! Besides, what Elysia sees is what Elysia gets. Right my baby?" He gushed over his daughter for a minute before averting his attention back to the road.

After a few minutes of browsing through the pumpkins and buying the biggest and the roundest, the family settled back into the car on their way back home.

"Daddy! Look! A tractor!"

"Don't you even think about pulling this car over. For one thing, she is too young to drive. And second of all, it wouldn't fit in the trunk."

Needless to say, Hughes marked into his plan book that when Elysia came of age to drive, she was going to get a tractor.

* * *

**A/N: **Er...nothing. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	70. November

**A/N: **One more after this one for the month series.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I don't own FMA.

* * *

**November**

November...the month of turkey dinners.

November was Havoc's favorite month, following February of course. It was the sure sign of overstuffed bellies sure to come with belts unbuckled. The month that brought the turkey, the stuffing, the gravy, the cranberry sauce, the potatoes, the cranberry sauce, the squash, the cranberry sauce...

Did he mention the cranberry sauce?

Ah yes, November. The time in which friends gathered around the table in celebration of something that did not exist in their world. A time in which the headmaster of the table would get to carve the roast beast (_"Honest, Roy! That bird is a beast!" "Uh huh, suuuure Ed.") _and send it out on plates to the hungry mouths.

"Havoc! Stop eating the cranberry sauce! We haven't even taken the turkey out of the oven yet!" Riza smacked the man with a spatula as he scooped another spoonful of the food into his mouth.

Yup, November was actually the month of cranberry sauce in disguise. Don't let the tabloids fool you.

* * *

**A/N: **Eh, nothing to say. _(Sweatdrops.)_

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	71. December

**A/N:** Last one in the month series. And...almost three-quarters of the way completed with this series. :3 So then I can work on Challenge Fics and stuff. (See my live journal for details later on...let's say...when I have this series done and when I have an entry up and going. XD)

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I don't own FMA. (But in my little world..._I do...Shh...)_

* * *

**December**

At long last, the year had passed. Fresh fallen snow blanketed the earth, and a few late-night working people were bustling back and forth on the streets wrapped head to toe in warm clothing.

It was the last day of the year. The last day of December. The final minutes until a new year showed its face. Everyone working late was rushing home to be with loved ones to do the countdown and start off the year with a bang.

Riza picked up two glasses of wine and handed one to the Colonel. "Well, this year has been extremely...interesting."

Roy nodded, taking a glass. "Indeed, it has." He looked over at the far end of the room where the Elrics stood, bickering.

"AL! WE ARE NOT GOING TO GET ANY KITTENS IN THE NEW YEAR!"

"But brother! We need a change! Kitties will help bring the change!"

"I said no!"

"Aw, can you say no to such a cute face like this?"

"Mew?"

"Of course I can, NO!"

"HISS!"

Roy and Riza rolled eyes and chuckled at the one conversation between the Elric brothers. They turned in a different direction where Havoc, Breda, Falman, and Fuery were all huddled together over a case of beer.

"I say, gentlemen, that in this upcoming year, I will get a girlfriend that the Colonel will not steal from me!" Havoc held up his drink.

Falman held up his as well. "Please do, I don't want to play matchmaker again.

Suddenly, there was a squeal, and it wasn't from Winry. Armstrong, in all his sparkling glory, pointed to the clock. "It is almost time! Commence the countdown!"

"Ten..."

"Nine..."

"Eight..."

"Seven..."

Riza and Roy turned to each other with a smile.

"Six..."

"Five..."

"Four..."

"Three..."

The two placed their glasses onto a nearby desk and approached each other.

"Two..."

They wrapped their arms around each other...

"One! HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

Riza and Roy kissed. Amongst all the cheering, there was one voice that was distinctly Edward's yelling for the Bastard Colonel to get a room.

* * *

**A/N: **Aha! End of the series. XD 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	72. Dares

**A/N: **Eh, here's some drabbles. o.o I won't put a note unless need be now. I have nothing to say anymore. (_Dark cloud) _I'm such a boring person. T.T

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Dares**

Roy gulped. He peered around the corner slowly, and just as he did, another person looked back at him and he whipped his head back around as to avoid being spotted. Why was he doing this again? Oh, yeah, the question at the moment for him was probably what he was doing and what the hell was he on when he agreed to this...dare.

Who's bright idea was it again?

_(Flashback)  
"You know," Roy marched around his office boldly, watching as everyone stared at him waiting for him to continue his speech, "I bet that I can kiss Edward and get away with it."_

_(End flashback)_

Oh yeah, it was his.

Brilliant, Mustang, bloody brilliant.

"Well, go on!" Havoc and his cronies cheered from the other end of the hallway. "Go for it! We know you can do it!" They laughed.

Well, fine then.

Mustang gathered up whatever courage he had that remained and stepped around the corner. Havoc and the gang rushed over to his spot and watched as he marched boldly over to Edward.

"Well, hello Fullmetal, nice day, is it not?" Roy sat down next to Edward.

Edward looked up from a book, turned his head slowly to Mustang and blinked.

Roy saw this as a good sign that he wouldn't face a painful death right away, so he stalled for some time to assure himself. "What book are you reading? Another alchemy text?"

Edward continued to stare. "..."

Mustang cringed inwardly when he heard some giggling from the corner. He turned his head slightly and saw Havoc making encouraging motions...that only ended up causing him to squirm in his seat and send the men giggling like school girls.

"What are you up to, Mustang?" Roy whipped his head around and saw that Edward had put his book down and was watching him curiously with narrowed eyes.

"Uh, well, you see..." _Now. NOW DAMNIT. _Roy sighed. "Don't kill me, Ed." He leaned forward ever so quickly and kissed him. Point blank.

Havoc and the others gasped. A dead silence filled the room.

Mustang pulled away, waiting for the impending doom...

...only to find Edward passed out on the floor with a very content look on his face.

Taking this as a good sign, Roy stood up and strutted past the cronies. "What did I tell you?" He smirked. "Can't resist my charm."

* * *

**A/N: **Hah, cute? 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	73. Morning

**A/N:** Been forever since I last updated this series, hasn't it? Only updating to satisfy a very patient reviewer. And plus, as a note, school is approaching quickly. Senior year. Dreadful. Anyway, sorry for delaying FMA, cause Naruto caught my attention (SasuNaru forever y0!) and have been addicted since. Anyway, my apologies and enjoy.

Oh, and **Fae** **Elric**, I am currently working on betaing that fic you sent me. Will be sending it ASAP.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Morning**

The sun began to peek over the hillside, spreading its light and warmth across the dew covered grass. The crickets that had been singing a night melody slowly hushed, allowing the birds to take over with their own symphony. The streets came alive, people coming out to fetch their newspapers or heading out to work.

Two people weren't part of that crowd. These two were sprawled on the king-sized bed, both in a tangle of limbs and bed sheets.

The smaller of the two, Edward, raised a sleepy head and yawned. Peering around the room, he noticed his bedmate and grinned. Raising a flesh hand, he poked the other person in the side.

The bed buddy, Roy, snorted indignantly and swatted the blond.

Ed poked him again, receiving another snort and swat. "Eh, get up."

"Mmpgh."

Ed rolled his eyes before poking Roy again, this time with his automail digit. The cold metal shocked warm skin, causing the larger man to jump up and glare, drowsily.

"Whaaaat?"

The blond gave puppy eyes. "Breakfast?"

Roy grumbled and rolled over, mumbling under his breath. "Get it yourself."

The elder Elric glared before kicking the man off the bed. Roy shot up with a shocked look. Ed stood on the mattress, pointing to the door.

"Breakfast, now!"

"Morning to you, too," Roy grumbled before grabbing his bathrobe and marched to the kitchen, Ed yipping happily behind him.

* * *

**A/N:** Maamaa, I am sorry for delaying this series once again. (Bows with apologies) 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	74. Evening

**A/N: **I feel so accomplished! I have most of my homework done, therefore I can update. Hee. So anyways, I chose this moment to update FMA. Again. I was going to work on Furuba, but decided 'eh, let's work on this one instead…'. So I did. Enjoy. n.n

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I don't own FMA. **

* * *

****Evening**

Edward glanced at the clock, then stared out the window. The sun was just setting, sky colored with deep hues, and the night creatures started to sing.

The house was silent, save for the consistent '_tick…tock…tick…tock…' _from the clock on the wall and the pitter patter of feet on the floor, accompanied by a '_clink' _from the automail foot of Edward's.

He was pacing. Damnit he hated to pace, but he couldn't help himself! _He _was an hour late than he normally was, and it was worrying him. He had called the office several times only to have Riza reply that the Colonel had left at the usual time and was on his way home.

He glanced at the clock once more. Only a minute has passed. Damnit.

Approaching the window, he brushed back the curtain and his eyes widened with a grin creeping on his face.

'_Aha!'_

He charged to the door, and just as the first sounds of footsteps reached his ears, he threw the door open and latched himself onto Roy's chest, wrapping his legs around his waist.

"You're home!"

"Good evening, Edward." Roy was about to say something more but Edward chirped up, eyeing his cargo.

"What'd yah bring me for dinner?" Ed snatched the plastic bags Roy was toting and dashed off into the kitchen with them, leaving Roy standing in the doorway.

The dark haired man blinked, then sighed, then kicked off his shoes. "So much for '_how was your day at work, Roy?' _Can't even get that."

"Bastard! You forgot the chicken!"

Sigh.

* * *

**A/N: **XD Couldn't help myself. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	75. Crabs

**A/N: **Meh, school started. It's so long, and hard, and troublesome—let's eat it! (Yes, I'm going to eat the school.) This series has been on my to-finish list for some time now, and it's about time I got to work on it. I blame school, **_Naruto: Clash of Ninja_**, and awesome fan fiction for my procrastination—er...delay.

**Note:** Alphonse is restored in this, as well as Edward.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Crabs**

"Al! Put it back!"

"But brother! He's cute!"

"Cute my ass! He's ugly and mean!"

"Only because you were picking on him! It's not his fault!"

"Put the damn thing back NOW!"

"But brother!"

Winry rubbed at her temples. It was supposed to be a simple day at the beach in which the three of them could relax and enjoy a little free time with the water and comfortable breeze. Can't have that, now can we?

Of course not.

First off, Edward sulked about getting sand between his toes and that the sun was too bright. Next, when the three were going to go into the water, Edward complained that it was too cold. Thinking that it was a good idea at the time, Alphonse threw him in.

That's what set off the next chain of events.

Edward had dashed like a rampaging rooster out of the water after Al, only to trip and fall on his face, landing next to a resting creature part of the landscape. A crab.

Ed, thinking that it would make an excellent projectile, threw it at all—

--only it didn't fly.

It clipped its claw into his hair and wouldn't release him until Winry pried the little demon crab away. Alphonse, eager to find out what it was that sent Edward into hysterics, rushed over and snatched the creature away in aw.

Which lead up to this point with Alphonse chasing Edward around on the beach with a demon crab.

Winry vowed next time she would leave the two at home and bring a book instead.

* * *

**A/N:** Envision Alphonse chasing Edward holding a crab with the demon horns, tail, and the little trident. See it? Perfect. That's my crab. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	76. Clouds

**A/N:** Here's another update because whoo, what's better than one update? Two!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Clouds**

"Bunny!"

"And what's that one right there?"

"It's a tree!"

"Really, Elysia?"

"Yup! And the one next to that one is a puppy!"

Gracia smiled at her daughter as she pointed at random clouds and announced proudly what they resembled. So far, in the past half hour, they had three kittens, four puppies, six trees, five shrimp (dubbed "Edo-kun!"), and about a dozen butterflies float by lazily in the blue sky.

"Hey mommy!" Gracia's eyes widened as Elysia sat up from the grass and giggled. "Can you guess what that cloud looks like?" She pointed to a particular one that was off seemingly floating over a building in the distance.

Gracia looked and pondered. "Hm...is that a tree?"

Elysia shook her head. "No, silly! Try again."

"A puppy?"

"No! Try again."

"I don't know," Gracia turned towards her daughter. "What is it?"

Elysia smiled, eyes twinkling. "It's daddy. He's smiling, see?"

Gracia whipped back to the cloud and indeed, when she peered at it closer, it did look like Hughes smiling down at them.

Gracia smiled.

* * *

**A/N:** I'm sad about him dying and all—but I'm in total denial. Right, if I'm in denial why did I write this? I don't know...(Purses lips). Erk. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	77. Wrestling

**A/N:** Hm...whoo! 300 reviews! Yay! (Party)

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Wrestling**

"You have got to be kidding me."

A smirking Havoc, something one doesn't see very much everyday, dragged Mustang down the hall to the office cackling. "Does it look like I'm joking? 'Course not!"

The Colonel sighed. "I'm just curious as to who was stupid enough to come up with this shenanigan."

"Why that would be Fullmetal of course."

"Oh," Roy sighed again. "That explains a lot."

"Explains a lot about what?"

Havoc and Roy stopped in the doorway and blinked down at a scowling Edward. The blond raised an eyebrow before his gaze traveled to Havoc and he gave a quick thumbs up. "Thanks, Havoc."

"No problem." With that, the man quickly shuffled away, leaving Edward scowling at Roy and Roy blinking down at Ed.

Roy finally sighed once more before asking the question. "What is going on Fullmetal?"

"There's a wrestling match."

"And what does that have to do with me?"

"I set you up in a match against Armstrong."

"Okay—wait, WHAT?"

Edward smirked in the cocky 'haha, you're gonna get yo' ass whooped' kind of fashion. "Yup. You're set up in a match against the big boy."

"Why in hell's name did you do that!"

"Because I sure as hell am not going against him," Edward said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Ah! There's my faithful opponent!" Both turned to the other side of the room where Armstrong stood, shirtless, with sparkles flowing at full blast. "I am overwhelmed by your desire to confront me in a match! I will not hold back, for surely you won't either!"

Edward grinned. "Yup! No holding back!"

"Edward!"

Ed whirled around and shoved Roy towards the sparkling man. "Go on Roy. Go fight 'im!" He yanked the man's jacket off before grabbing the collar of the white shirt underneath and yanked the man down to eyelevel. "Remember, my money's on you, so if you lose, I'm kicking your ass myself."

Roy blinked. "Why did you put money on me when you know I'll lose against him?"

"It gives me a legitimate reason to kick your ass now go lose—er—win, bastard!" Ed cheered as he backed behind a desk where Riza sat with a bored look on her face, tallying up the cash in the bets.

* * *

**A/N:** XD No comment. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	78. Piñata

**A/N:** Whoo. Three updates now turns into four.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Piñata**

"You know, bastard, you would make a very good piñata."

That wasn't something he had been expecting for a sarcastic comeback.

Roy had heard various comments from the young alchemist, ranging from "I'm going to kick your ass into Aquroya." to "I'm going to shove that pen so far up your nostril that you'll be sniffing ink for a year.", but "You would make a very good piñata." wasn't one he was ready to hear at that moment.

Hence why he now had coffee all over his desk after spluttering for a good five minutes.

"Excuse me?"

Edward nodded. "You would. I can see it now. You're clad in underwear with 'Jackass' printed on the bottoms, tied up to a tree, hands bound behind you, feet tucked up like a hog's, and people gathered around. Each of them wielding some sort of tool, like a stick or a bat, all with blindfolds beating the snot out of you."

Roy gave Edward a look. "That's—interesting."

"That's on my wish list that Hughes is making me write." Edward grinned insanely. "It'll be in my top five range."

The blond then turned and practically danced out of the office, leaving a flabbergasted Roy in his wake. Just as the blond was out of sight, Riza entered.

Riza stared at the mess on the desk. "Uh, sir—"

"Hawkeye, I have a question for you."

"Sir?"

"Several actually."

"Go ahead."

"First off, did Hughes make Edward write a wish list?"

"Yes, sir."

"Okay, and second, do I really look like I'd make a good piñata?"

"Excuse me?"

"Thought so."

* * *

**A/N:** I can picture it now. It's so clearly envisioned in my mind. O.o 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	79. Vinegar

**A/N:** I think I'll do a few more updates before switching over and update my _Naruto _fics. Hope you enjoyed the updates!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Vinegar**

"_Vinegar is the solution to almost anything," Pinako had once told Edward when he was younger. "It does a lot of things for you. Ever get into a pickle, vinegar will probably be your best friend in the world."_

Hm. Well, he _was_ in a pickle at the moment, it couldn't hurt to try.

"Hey, Al, question for yah!"

"Yes, brother?"

"Do we have any vinegar?"

Al gave his brother a funny look—at least the best funny look he could give being a suit of armor. "What?"

"Do we have any vinegar?"

"What for?"

"I need it."

"As I asked, what for?"

"I just need it."

Sigh. "Brother—"

"Remember what Aunty Pinako said about vinegar being very helpful? Well, I need its help. So do we have any?"

Al hesitated. "Uh, I don't know, let me go check." Al rose from the chair and walked to the kitchen. As he reached for a cupboard, he paused. "Just what is it for anyway, I'm curious."

"Well, Mustang is being an ass again and—"

Al threw open a cupboard and grabbed the largest jar, marching back into the room where Ed was. "Say no more, I got a bunch right here. If you need anymore, let me know."

* * *

**A/N:** Vinegar makes a very good cleaning agent. Even better in cooking. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	80. Tomorrow

**A/N:** Gah. I am slacking on my RoyEd fandom. _(Tear)_ I am guilty on all charges except for slack-age. And wouldn't you know, this has no RoyEd. _(Ubertear)_ I'm GUILTY!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Tomorrow**

Tomorrow was always known to bring promises of a new day filled with surprise and wonder. As long as time and life exists, there will always be a tomorrow.

Edward just wishes that his tomorrow would stop being so innocent seeming.

He wishes it were yesterday, last year, or earlier than that. His tomorrow's become a cyst the moment he went through the gate and landed on foreign soil. The moment he realized he could never go back, his tomorrow was filled with dread, yearning, and sadness.

He almost thought about ending it so there would be no more 'tomorrows' for him to deal with.

That was until he saw _his_ face.

That innocent face.

It reminded him of someone back at home. Someone waiting.

That's when he picked himself up off the floor, seized the day, and looked forward to the future. His 'it'll never happens' turned into 'when it happens', and his dread turned into determination.

_He will go back. _

"Hey..."

_He will go back._

"What are you working so hard for?"

_He will go back._

"Is there something important happening?"

_He will go back._

"No, Alfonse..."

_He will go back._

"There's someone waiting for me back at home."

_He **will** go back._

_I'll be home tomorrow._

* * *

**A/N:** _(Angsts in the corner at the lack of RoyEd)._

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	81. Rooftop

**A/N:** Welp, I finished the SasuNaru drabble series, and I want to finish this before I start _anything _else. So, be prepared for updates on this pretty much as often as possible. :3 This one here was requested by Chii as a continuation of drabble number 34 "Birthday". She kinda wanted a happy ending, so here it is for it. Yeah, I know I said I probably wouldn't continue it...but I felt bad too. --'

**

* * *

**

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA. I wish I did..._(plots)

* * *

_

**Rooftop**

"I didn't think you would be up here."

Edward turned his head to see Roy approaching. "What're you doing here? Shouldn't you be back at the office finishing up your paperwork?"

Roy made his way across the rooftop and stood beside the blond. He didn't say anything. Instead, he fished through his pockets and finally produced a small box and handed it to Edward. He then reached into his jacket and brought out an envelope.

The blond blinked at the items.

"Sorry about earlier," the man looked down at the Elric and gave a smile. "But, happy birthday, Edward."

Edward stared at the box and the envelope.

"Well, aren't you going to open it?" Roy persisted.

Edward smiled. "I think I'll save it for when I head back to the inn."

There was a silence that followed. Both figures looked out over the other rooftops until one of them spoke up once more.

"Hey, uh, Roy?"

"Mm?"

"Thanks."

"No problem."

* * *

**A/N: **There's the sequel you wanted, Chii. :) 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	82. Horse

**A/N:** With a busy schedule like mine, I haven't had much luck with working on many fics/drabbles. Fortunately, I had the good fortune to finally gain a study hall (whoohoo!) and thus, in celebration, have created a drabble. :P Anyway, yeah.**

* * *

Disclaimer: **

I don't own FMA.**

* * *

Horse**

Havoc slowly pulled the cigarette from his mouth and stared. And stared some more. And then blinked.

"Uh, Kain?"

Fuery looked up from his task and raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"What is that?" Havoc pointed with a just as slowly raised hand.

Fuery looked to where he was pointing and gasped in glee. "Ooh! It's Penny!" He shot up from his seat and ran to the kitchen window, which has a whole lot of horse filling it.

The horse looked up to the short man and made a soft snorting noise, and thus began to chew on the curtains, pulling them down with a tear.

"Penny!" Fuery grabbed at the curtains and made to yank them away but the horse shook its head, knocking the man to the side. Fuery tumbled onto his rear, and watched in horror as the horse proceeded to eat the remainder of the curtains. "Oh no!" He rushed back to the horse, waving his arms. "Penny! You spit that out right now! You hear me young lady? Spit them out right now! And stop laughing at me! I know you're laughing at me! Just you wait! You won't get any treats for a month! You're grounded!"

Havoc didn't know whether to feel horrified or to be amused. It wasn't everyday you saw a horse poke its head through the kitchen window to grab a snack. But really, who cares? Those were butt ugly curtains.

* * *

**A/N:** Planet's Funniest Animals is my crack. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	83. Spinny Chair

**A/N:** Next. :3

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Spinny Chair**

The spinny chair--the best damn chair in the world.

It did things that other chairs didn't: _It would spin!_

Edward seated himself happily on Roy's favorite chair and sighed, leaning back as he sank into the cushions.

_'Comfy...'_

He placed his feet on the desk. His eyes shifted back and forth deviously.

_'Well, Riza said to feel free to relax...why not?'_

He pulled himself a little closer to the desk, and then kicked to propel himself into a tizzy with the world flying by him at top speed. He leaned farther back into the chair, grinning as the chair slowed after its journey took him to the filing cabinets.

_'One more time!'_

He kicked off.

The door flew open.

"EDWARD!"

The chair skidded across the room but was absent of one Edward Elric, who now laid flat on his back from the sudden entrance of one none-too-pleased Roy Mustang.

* * *

**A/N:** Nuffin'. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	84. Letters

**A/N: **Some delay in updates due to a family crisis. Anyway, it's resolved the best as it could be, and well, yeah. This drabble actually leads to a future series I'm going to be writing that's focused post-series pre-movie era in the FMA realm. For more information go to my profile in the Future Works section. It's for Letters to Edward.

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I don't own FMA. **

* * *

**

**Letters**

The day he disappeared was one of great tragedy. Not only did they lose a skilled alchemist, but they lost a good friend and a loyal brother. They lost someone that had etched their being into their own souls, and it hurt.

They all made a silent agreement that he would come back. As improbable it seemed, they just _knew _somehow, someway, he would come back.

And until he did, they would write letters to him as though he were still there with them.

They would keep him up to date. They would chat about the weather, asking how things are, and when he would come around town again.

The first few letters would hurt, but as the time went by, the pain would dull--writing those words would be second nature.

They didn't know whether he would ever get the chance to read them, but if he returned--_when _he returned, they would keep writing and ignore the pain.

* * *

**A/N:** In the mini-series that I'll be writing the characters from the alchemy-using world will be writing letters to Edward. There will only be one letter per character, except for two characters (Al and Sieg, they will be writing 2). It'll be kind of angsty. o.O 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	85. Revenge of the Photos

**A/N: **That last one was incredible angsty. o.O Time for humor.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Revenge of the Photos**

Yes. Perfect.

_All was going according to plan._

Hughes peered through his binoculars through the inn window at the people within the room. Ed was polishing his automail and Winry was polishing Al's back for him. Pinako was talking to the others in what was most likely her authoritive tone, telling them the things that she planned for them in the upcoming week.

Hughes cackled.

He was going to get Lady Pinako if it was the last thing he did.

He watched as Pinako head over to the cupboard. _Yes, yes! No! Darn it! Not that cupboard!  
_

His expression of evil glee deflated when Pinako went back to her task of lecturing.

_Come on--you know you want to--oh, wait--is she? Is--she is! SHE IS!  
_

Pinako opened a sliding drawer, and in a fantastic display like confetti from a balloon, photos sprayed all over the room.

Hughes could hear the shriek from the three kids, but no sound came from Pinako.

When the rain of pictures cleared, Ed, Al, and Winry were lined up against the wall looking panicky. Pinako merely walked to the closet and grabbed a broom, and began to sweep out the sheets.

He watched in shock and awe as she opened the window after sweeping the pictures into a dustpan and dumped them.

_Woah...she's good._

* * *

**A/N:** I picture a spring trap loaded with photographs. Oh dear. o.O 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	86. Switched Luggage

**A/N: **Doot dee doo, pie. o.o;

* * *

**Disclaimer:** Don't own. Can't sue. (Does a little dance)

* * *

**Switched Luggage**

"Ed!" The blonde charged across the platform and grabbed Edward in a death grip of a hug, choking him slightly as she giggled in joy. "I'm so glad you came to see me off!"

The corners of Roy's mouth turned up as Ed gurgled. He placed down the bags of luggage and went to rescue his little blond.

"Of course he would see you off, Miss Rockbell. Edward may not appear it, but he is very much a gentlemen inside."

Ed's eye twitched with annoyance and at the implications. "Oh hush you." He turned back to Winry. "Be careful heading out there. Take care of yourself."

WInry stuck her tongue out at Ed. "Don't worry, I'll be fine. I'll just smack people with my wrench if they bother me."

Roy sweatdropped. "Oh boy."

The train whistle blew and Winry whirled on her heel. "Well, I gotta go!" She grabbed a bag and slung it over her shoulder. "You two behave yourselves in Central!"

Ed picked up one of the other bags and chucked it at Roy. "We'll be fine. Better get a move on!"

Winry jumped into the train just as it started to chug forward. The two males waved as she stuck out her head and waved happily.

-----

"Oh, I'm _exhausted!" _Winry flopped onto the bed at the inn and sighed. "Might as well take my shower and hop into bed. Got a busy day tomorrow!"

She rose from her bed and went to her bag and opened it only to do a double take. "What the--" She reached in and pulled out a pair of boxers. Her face tinged pink. "Oh god no..."

-----

_Meanwhile..._

"Hey, uh, Ed?"

"What, bastard?"

"Since when did you wear _these?"_

"Huh--what the--WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HOLDING THOSE?"

"They were in the bag."

"..."

"...just curious, would there be any chances of you wearing these tonight?"

"No."

"Darn."

* * *

**A/N:** Nuffin'. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	87. Pillows

**A/N: **Doodle - ee - dee - doodle - ee - doo.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**Pillows**

Soft, squishy, fluffy, overstuffed, wonderful pillows.

Ed snuggled his head into the delightful object and released a sigh of contentment. Yes, life was good at the moment. Just him and his pillow. The one thing he could punch, bite, tear, alchemize, and load with insults and it wouldn't fight back.

That's what made the lovely little object called a pillow so delightful.

That is--until the pillow moved and snorted.

Ed's eyes flew open.

Pillows don't move unless moved.

And pillows certainly don't make noises that sound like snorts.

He slowly moved his gaze to his pillow in question and instead of seeing white--he saw blue.

Ed jumped back and stared flabbergasted at Roy who was smirking oh-so cockily where his once beloved pillow once laid. The Colonel's smart ass demeanor only got cockier.

He patted the bed.

"Come on now, Edward. I was having fun cuddling with you." Roy then put a hand to his chin. "You know, I never knew you were the type to actually like doing that."

Ed's eye twitched just before he punched the other man in the stomach.

_Lesson #13: When you are Edward Elric's pillow, you will be punched no matter the situation or the cause._

* * *

**A/N:** And Roy learns the rest of the lessons in being a pillow the hard way. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	88. Knitting

**A/N:** "_Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me! _Sorry, listening to "Bohemian Rhapsody". n.n

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Knitting**

"Erm," Roy tugged at the hem of the sweater awkwardly and raised an eyebrow. "It's--nice, but--"

Edward elbowed him.

Roy suddenly put on a smile. "But what's the occasion?"

Winry put on a giant grin. "It's a new hobby I took when I'm not working on automail! I learned knitting from the neighbors, and decided I wanted to make something for everyone."

Roy pulled at the hem again.

Ed forced his own smile. "That's very nice of you, I uh--" He glanced at the awkwardly shaped socks and waved them. "I like them. A lot."

Winry beamed. "I'm glad! I'll make extra for you guys especially."

Both guys cringed. "Th-thanks?"

The blonde mechanic beamed and skipped off to deliver her other gifts.

Edward waited until the girl was out of sight before crying out in agony. "GAH! I'M GOING TO KILL THEM!"

Roy glared at the bright pink knitted sweater just before he ripped it off and dug out his gloves. "You didn't see this."

The other alchemist handed the socks to Roy with a glare. "Hey, I won't tell only if you get rid of these too."

Roy took them. "No second biddings needed."

* * *

**A/N:** Ever get something like that and not like it? Yeah... 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	89. Snowman

**A/N:** As requested by Fireness, some drabbles with Riza or Roy/Riza. :3 Because we all need a little Hawkeye in our lives. XD

**

* * *

**

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Snowman**

She was on her way to the store when she had spotted him making one. She watched from the street corner as he shuffled around in his oversized jacket and rolled the sticky snow into a large ball, positioning it on the center of the front yard.

She continued to watch as he rolled two more balls, both smaller than the first and one smaller than the other, and positioned them on top of the largest.

He repeated the process and stacked another set right beside the first mound.

She stepped around the corner and continued her watch as he carved and shaped and added snow. He plucked out items such as a scarf to the first mound, mittens, and little pebbles--making faces, adding clothes, and making them appear human-like.

The first creature in from his creation was familiar in stature and appearance. It resembled him, only it wasn't as colorful as he.

The second creature she eyed. It was familiar too, and she knew it was supposed to be her. Only, there was something missing--

Roy watched as Riza approached with her scarf in hand and wrapped it around her 'clone', and plucked off a hair clip, inching it into the snow hair. He smiled at her as she nodded towards his work and continued on her way to her original task.

On her way back, his snowman was repositioned so it resembled a kneeling figure holding a small box in its hands towards the girl snow figure. But the box in its hands wasn't made of snow.

She smiled at the face watching from the window as she took the box, opened it, and slipped the ring onto her finger.

The next day the snow figures were reshaped to show both of them holding hands and both were wearing what appeared to be wedding rings.

* * *

**A/N: **Mmm. Snow. I want snow. o.O 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	90. Trees

**A/N:** Some more Roy/Riza cause I can and plus--it was requested. :P

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Trees**

It was beneath the trees where they first met. She on her way to school and he on his way to the pond for a day of fishing and skipping stones. She lectured him about how education was very important and he brushed it off, mocking her for being one of those types of girls that always had a nose shoved in a book and never got outside much. She huffed and went on her way, hoping to one day meet him again in the future to show it exactly what type of girl she was.

It was beneath the trees where they had ran into each again weeks later. She was holding her papa's rifle and was target practicing and he had stumbled into the area when the sounds had caught his attention. He had been reading through one of the books he had swiped from her when she wasn't looking when the noises started.

They stared at each other for the longest time--her with the gun in her grasp and he with her book in one hand opened to the part of the story where Romeo first saw Juliet and fell in love.

An uneasy silence passed through and the two suddenly smiled at each other and laughed awkwardly. Well, what a predicament this was.

From then on they met under the trees and learned more about the other--her papa was in the military and she was working her way through school and weapons training in high hopes of she too joining in the ranks alongside her father. His father was also a military man, a drunk one more often than not.

She was an excellent sharpshooter. He was an excellent alchemist in the art with fire.

Their meetings continued through her days in school, and he too even started attending--he claimed the fish were getting scarce and the days alone were starting to become a bore. Their last meeting under the trees was when she learned she had to leave. Her father was sending her to an excellent military academy to prepare her for her career.

That was the last time they saw each other for a while.

Several years later, it was beneath the same set of trees where they met again by accident. She was target practicing and he had been reading a book on alchemy when he had heard the noises.

Riza was a military woman. Roy was a state alchemist. And they became more than friends beneath those trees.

* * *

**A/N:** I like trees. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	91. Shoes

**A/N:** The countdown starts now. Not including this one there is nine more to post. :0

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Shoes**

"Hey, have any of you seen my shoes?"

Havoc looked up from his newsppaer and cocked an eyebrow. "Wha--"

"My shoes are gone." Roy pointed to his sock clad feet.

Again Havoc cocked the eyebrow. "Weren't they on your feet?"

Roy let out a sigh of exasperation. "I took them off because my feet were hurting, and when I woke from my nap, they weren't where I had left them."

The smoker shrugged. "Don't ask me. I don't have a shoe fetish."

The Flame Alchemist twitched and cursed. "I bet Fullmetal took them. Knowing him he showed up and got annoyed with me for sleeping on the job, then decided to be an evil little punk and took them just to get his revenge. Yeah, I bet that's what happened. Next time I see him I'll give him a rotten mission, I'll--"

"Here you go, sir." Riza entered, holding a pair of freshly polished shoes and handed them to the Colonel. "I took the liberty of polishing them during your nap." With that, she turned and headed back to where she had come from.

Roy stared at the shoes and then towards Havoc. "So, I guess it wasn't Ed, neh?"

Havoc blew out a puff of smoke. "So, does this mean that you will be giving Hawkeye a rotten mission, sir?"

* * *

**A/N:** I'd like to see him try. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	92. Valentine's Day

**A/N:** Not too many more now. o.o And yes, I realize V-day is quite a ways away, but who cares? XD Besides, I'm in a holiday spirit. I'm writing a Valentine's Day drabble listening to Christmas music getting ready for Halloween. o.o; Mmmyeah.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Valentine's Day  
**It was quite obvious whoever left the card and box of chocolates was suicidal. Because really, who would attempt to swoon Hawkeye, sharpshooter extraordinaire, out of the blue? 

Obviously the fool that left these items on her desk, that's who.

She eyed everyone in the room. Who could the culprit be? Havoc? Stupid, but not _that _stupid. Breda? Not the romantic type. Fuery? He looked to her more as a mentor. Falman?

She chuckled. Falman would _never _write 'sup baby' in a million years, even if he were threatened to be put to death.

Armstrong? No sparkles, so it's not him. Hughes? He already has a wife, and he had been not be cheating on his wife! If he is, he's going to have an ass full of lead and—

"Hey Hawkeye! Get my card and chocolates?"

Mustang. Should've known.

"Yes, sir, but what is the occasion?"

Roy gave her a funny look. "It's Valentine's Day. Duh."

* * *

**A/N:** I love that last line. XD 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	93. Snake

**A/N:** One more down. :P

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Snake**

"Kill it!"

"Don't you dare hurt Charlie!"

"KILL IT!"

"No! Leave Charlie alone!"

"KILL IT!"

Hawkeye's eye twitched as she watched both Havoc and Fuery scramble around the room in an attempt to catch whatever the hell it was they were trying to catch.

Well, Fuery was scrambling around the room. Havoc was scrambling up the curtains.

Hawkeye shook her head with a sigh and left the room.

Didn't they know that the snake was curled around the curtain rod?

"EEEEEEK!!"

Well, seems they know now.

* * *

**A/N:** XD 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	94. Smores

**A/N:** I wanted a little break from focusing on just Riza. She's still in this drabble, but we have someone else in the spotlight this time.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Smores**

Hughes ooed and awed as he carefully placed the graham cracker onto the melting marshmallow. With a tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth, he narrowed his eyes just as he laid the cracker down in the exact spot. Careful...caaaareful...

"Hughes, what are you doing?"

The cracker smeared into the marshmallow and dug into the melted chocolate underneath.

Exasperated, Hughes shot up and turned to face Hawkeye who was quirking an eyebrow. "I was trying to make the perfect smore!"

She tilted her head. "Smore?"

"Yes! You know, graham cracker, chocolate, marshmallow..."

She glared. "Yes, I do know what a smore is. I was wondering _why _you were doing it in the office. Don't tell me they're for Elysia."

Hughes grinned. "Nope. I was just in the mood for smores."

Riza blinked and watched as the man took the ruined smore and shoved it into his mouth whole.

* * *

**A/N:** I love smores. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	95. Out of Order

**A/N:** Crack drabble. XD

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Out of Order**

Edward rushed into the building like his butt was on fire.

The first place he ran to was the restroom on the first floor and saw a sign posted on it that read "Under Construction".

"Aa, damn!"

He charged to the next closest bathroom. It took read a sign, but this one said "Under Redecorating."

"ARG!"

After running around and finding sixteen more "Under Redecorating" signs, twenty seven more "Under Construction" signs, and twelve "Out of Order'" signs posted, a loud and incoherent shriek filled the building.

The only one not stunned by the obscene noise was Roy, who was actually cackling like an escaped asylum patient.

Riza turned and glared at him. "Sir, may I ask what is so funny?"

Roy grinned as he shuffled the papers on the desk. "Fullmetal has found my welcome back present."

* * *

**A/N:** n.n Cruel, yes. Funny, definitely. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	96. Scarves

**A/N:** Eh, something random that popped into my head.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Scarves**

"Now make sure you have it on tight enough."

"Yes ma'am."

"Havoc, where the hell do you think you're going?"

"I was heading out to—"

"GET BACK IN HERE AND PUT YOUR SCARF ON."

Rush. Scramble. Crash. Fwooph.

"Better?"

"Yes...now you may go."

"Erm...Hawkeye?" Fuery timidly raised his mitten-clad hand awkwardly. "May I ask a question?"

"You just did, but go ahead."

"When did you become our mother?"

"...put your scarves on and get out. All of you! Shoo!"

* * *

**A/N:** No comment. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	97. Sleeping Powder

**A/N:** Four left total.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Sleeping Powder**

"Miss Hawkeye! Miss Hawkeye!" Alphonse rushed out of Colonel Mustang's office in a whirlwind of clanging metal. "Something's wrong with the Colonel! And it wasn't Ed's fault this time!"

Riza looked up from her file. She rose from her chair and followed the young Elric into the office to find Roy slumped over his desk with a puddle of drool coming out of his mouth and a content smile on his face. The other Elric brother was poking and prodding him as he called him names.

The woman took one look and barked out a sharp laugh. "Oh boys, I forgot to tell you! The colonel's been pretty busy lately. We had a really bad crime spree that has kept him up for over two weeks. We tried to get him to take a few naps here and there, but the case was his first priority. So I took the liberty of dumping some sleeping powder into his afternoon tea." She glanced at her watch. "I say that he'll be out for at least forty-eight hours."

"Forty-eight hours!"

"What are we supposed to do till then!?"

Riza shrugged. "Go bug the librarian?"

Ed narrowed his eyes. "Just how much of that sleeping powder _did _you stick in his drink?"

Riza smirked with narrowed eyes. "Wouldn't _you _like to know."

* * *

**A/N:** No comment. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	98. Library

**A/N:** Three left all together.

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Library**

Libraries, in Edward's opinion, were fun.

Fun to hang out at and to read books in, but that's what everyone says.

No, the libraries were fun for more than just that reason.

In libraries, you could play hide and seek.

Yes, hide and seek.

Edward hides, and Mustang seeks.

Only, when Mustang isn't looking, Edward can sneak out and leave Flame Butt in the library searching for him for _hours._

And then, when Mustang finally did give up, he would return to the office where Riza, playing along with the older Elric's game of "Keep the Colonel on His Toes", would proudly announce that "...Fullmetal was waiting for Mustang in the office almost the entire day and you didn't bother to show up, some Colonel you are!"

And thus the process would repeat all over again.

But then, Edward also threw in a few more games.

Like his favorite game, "Hide the Bastard's Gloves Among the Old Newspapers".

Ah, yes, that was a classic.

Especially since Edward never could remember just where he would hide them.

Yup, libraries were fun.

A fun place to drive the colonel up the wall, that is.

* * *

**A/N:** No comment. 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	99. Moving Day

**A/N:** Two more total. o.o

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own.

* * *

**Moving Day**

Hughes rushed around the house in a fit of hysterics. "No! Don't touch that! I'll move that myself! My precious baby made that for me!"

The moving man hesitated and went off to move the couch instead.

Once again, Hughes dashed to another moving man that was just trying to do his job.

"No! I'll move that! My precious honey-bun made that for me!"

The man eyed him and went on his way.

This lasted for a good hour and a half before one of the men cracked.

"Sir! If you don't want us to move this stuff, why did you bother hiring us? We're here to move your stuff, not to dance around guessing what we can or can't move!" His eye twitched spasmodically.

Riza stepped in. "You do whatever you need to do, fellas, _he won't have anything more to say..." _She brought out her trusty pistol and cocked it.

Hughes didn't say anything—at least, not until one of the dry noodles fell off the picture frame Elysia had made at school.

That was soon followed by the ring of gun fire.

* * *

**A/N: **Ah, moving day. :P 

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


	100. Nightmare

**A/N:** Well, this is the last one in the series. Drabble 100. Till the third installment, which'll have to wait until I'm back into FMA once again. I've been more into Naruto and Bleach lately than ever. (Sweatdrops) Hope you liked, thanks for all the reviews and patience and uh...yeah, toodles!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I don't own FMA.

* * *

**Nightmare**

"Oh my god."

Riza gaped at the sight before her.

The office—it was—well, **trashed. **

And men were laying around like rag dolls hiccupping like there was no tomorrow.

She pulled at her hair and began to freak out mentally_. 'The colonel's going to be pissed! Oh! He's going to be so mad when he sees this! It wasn't my fault though, I didn't do it! I had no part in this—this—whatever the hell it was!'_

"Lieutenant?"

Her eyes widened when she heard the familiar voice call out her name, but even more shock appeared on her face when she realized where the voice was coming from.

In the middle of the room, among the drunk and over partied men, was Roy Mustang in all his glory.

He waved a bottle of liquor. "Hey! You missed the party! Edward grew an inch! We had to celebrate!"

Riza clenched her fists and seethed.

No, the trashed office wasn't the nightmare.

Roy Mustang with an excuse to party was.

* * *

**A/N:** The end. Finished. Okay, you can go away now. o.O

**-Mint Pizza Queen**


End file.
